Identity Crisis
by MisoSoop
Summary: Lauren Daniels was always sure of who she was, until something happened that turned her life around. Lauren wakes up in a different house, with a different family, with a different name: Angela Shepard. But who's Angela anyway? No Msue. [Complete]
1. Chapter 1

_I know the whole "Girl goes to the past and meets the Gang" is overplayed. But trust me, this one will certainly be a bit (or a lot) different. The book never existed, which means the character never read it, which means there's no "Oh, yeah, hi Two-bit!" "How'd you know my name random girl?" "Oh you're all characters in a book I read." "Oh okay, wanna make out?" "You bet I do!" And then everyone falls in love and the story never ends. _

_Ahem. Yeah, none of that. Obviously I don't own The Outsiders. If I did, I'd have better things to do. Like spend my money. Don't forget, Reviews make the authors happy. It also let's me know if things should be changed or what not._**

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Identity Crisis

_One_

I went to sleep in a rather good mood that night. I had proven my theory that you could run perfectly well during a normal day with no sleep at all and I was out like a light the moment I got comfortable. My last thought was "What am I gonna do with a hundred bucks anyway?"

The date when I went to bed that night was June 10th, 2006 at 9:49 P.M. The first days of summer vacation had passed in a rather dull way. But things were different when I woke up the next morning.

I could hear yelling from somewhere in the house as the sun wormed it's way through the blinds on my window. I sighed and stretched and opened my eyes, before they slowly closed again. I rubbed them with my hands before giving it another go. They stayed open this time but...

I slowly sat up on a bed that wasn't mine, in a room that wasn't mine and had no clue as to what was going on. Unless I was having another _very _realistic dream, in which case, I'd only be in the room for a minute.

The door opened suddenly and a boy ran in, with curly black hair and somewhat tan skin. An older boy tackled him to the floor and I noticed that the younger one looked like...well, the older one's mini-me. They wrestled for a minute and I sat, waiting for this extremely random dream to end, but they suddenly stopped and looked at me. They looked as confused as I probably did.

"You okay, Angela?" The older one asked. I noticed he had a scar on his face and wondered where he had gotten it from. I didn't know why he had called me Angela; my name was Lauren.

The younger boy untangled himself from the older one, glaring at him, before looking at me.

"Yeah, you ain't yelled at us or nothin'," he said, sounding surprised. I blinked and dark eyes blinked back.

"Uh...get out?" I tried, feeling a bit stupid. The two boys stared at me a moment longer before standing up and leaving the room. I noticed after awhile that they had an accent when they talked.

Come to think of it, so did I. But I sat, pushing the thought away as I tried to wake up while listening to yelling and a TV playing somewhere in the house.

The older boy peeked in awhile later, pushing the door until it hit the wall and giving me a firm look.

"Alright, you've been sitting here for twenty minutes–"

"Twenty minutes?"

He glared at me before continuing. "Yeah, twenty minutes. Now what the hell is goin' on Angela? You're actin' like someone else today."

"Uhm...well," I paused, looking him straight in the eye. "What's your name again?"

"Angela, are you tryin' to be funny? 'Cause it ain't workin'," he snapped.

"Humor me," I said, watching as he sighed and put a hand on his forehead.

"It's Tim, Angela. Tim Shepard. I'm your _brother_," he said, the annoyance in his voice obvious.

'_That's new,'_ I thought. _'I'm an only child last I checked.' _

"_You _are _my_ brother? That _can't _be right," I muttered, looking down at the white bed sheets.

"Obviously, you aren't feelin' _that_ bad," Tim said. "So you're gonna have to get off your ass sometime today." And with that he left, shutting the door behind him.

"C'mon," I muttered, closing my eyes and gripping the sheet that was still covering my lower body. "Wake up! Wake up, wake up, wake _up!_"

I hit my head with my hand and winced, mumbling 'ow' and placing the hand over the now sore area. That was when it finally sunk in.

'_I just felt pain. . .in a dream. You aren't supposed to feel pain in dreams,' _I thought as my eyes widened. _'Oh, my God. . .'_

I fell out of bed, crying out as I landed on the floor. I was up a second later though, stumbling to the window and yanking on the string that moved the blinds.

I had no idea where I was.

The panic was starting to set in and my body was sore from falling out of bed as I stumbled to the closet and pulled open the door.

Clothes I would never wear. Ever.

I looked around the unfamiliar room and saw a mirror perched on the dresser across from the bed. I ran to it and picked it up, my breathing heavy. I stared.

A girl that wasn't me stared back.

I dropped the mirror and barely noticed it break. Where was I? _Who _was I? Angela Shepard? I shared some features with those boys from what I could tell and Tim had said he was my brother. . .but who the hell was she?

I was gasping for air by now. I was lost, clueless, and the room was spinning as my body began shaking and my vision tunneled in. I felt myself hit the floor as everything shut down.

xxxx

"Angela? Angela, get up and off the fuckin' floor," a voice snapped, shaking my shoulder.

"Hey Tim, maybe she really is sick. She looks kinda pale."

"Shut up, Curly. Help me get her up off the floor. Mom'll probably be hacked off if we just leave her here."

The next thing I knew, I was being dropped onto that bed that wasn't mine.

"She's lucky it's the summer. . .the old lady wouldn't have wanted her stayin' home from school. Hey, Angela?"

I groaned and opened my eyes. "What?"

"Are you really that sick?"

It was the younger one asking me. Tim had said his name. Curly. What a really...weird name.

"I dunno," I replied. "Why?"

"'Cause no one's home if ya' are."

"She can stay at the Curtis's. Maybe that would get Pony's attention."

"Who?"

Tim grinned. "Well, whaddya know, she's over him before she even went in for the kill. Look kid, I'll drop ya off at the Curtis's on the way. I'm headin' out to meet up with the rest of the gang. I'll get ya when I'm done."

"Uhm. . .can I get dressed first?"

". . .Yeah, you probably should. Come on Curly, didn't you say you had places to be today? Get your ass out the door."

I managed to dig up a pair of pants and a tee-shirt. That seemed to be the only outfit I could wear. I found a pair of flip-flops in the closet and slipped those on. I grabbed a brush, ran it through my hair, which was now black and curly instead of dull and dirty blonde, and slowly walked out of my room. I didn't pay attention to the house.

'_I'll wake up soon, there's no point. This is just more realistic than it should be.' _

Tim lead me out the door and to his car. I climbed in and he started driving off before I could shut the door all the way.

"Damn it, Tim! What the hell are you thinking?" I yelled, yanking the door shut and sitting back against the chair. I felt sick. "If I throw up in your car it's your fault, not mine!"

"If you throw up in my car, I'm throwin' _you_ _out_ of it," Tim replied easily, his eyes on the road. At least he was doing that.

A few minutes later and Tim stopped outside a run down looking house and promptly kicked me out of his car.

"Don't drink anythin' today or I'll kick your ass into last week," Tim ordered, before driving off. I stood there, staring at the house, not quite sure what to do. I didn't even know who the Curtis's were. But if Tim knew them, they would know Angela, right?

I couldn't bring myself to move. I just stood in front of the chain link gate.

"Angela? What the hell are you doin' standin' around outside the Curtis's?" A rough voice demanded. I looked over, slowly, because my head hurt.

"What?"

"What the hell were you doin' last night? You look dead," a tow-headed boy said, smoking a cigarette as he walked up to me.

"I didn't do nothin'..." I replied quietly, looking at his clothes. I liked his jacket, it looked like my cousin's, one that I liked to wear when he wasn't looking. I didn't want to try that with him though, he looked pretty mean.

"Are just gonna stand out here or are you gonna go in?" He pushed open the gate. "Their parents are workin' right now, if that's what your worried about."

"Uhm. . .okay," I said uncertainly, following him into the yard and up to the porch. "What's your name again?"

He looked over his shoulder and glared at me as he knocked on the door. "You sure you didn't do anythin' last night?"

I decided I should stay quiet for the rest of the day. People were probably going to think I was insane. He pushed open the door, nearly hitting someone who was standing near it. He looked at me and waved me in. But for some reason I couldn't bring myself to walk into that house.

"Watch it next time, Dally, you almost hit me in the face," the one he had almost hit said. He was standing in front of Dally now, a smile on his face. "Angela? To what do we owe this pleasure?"

"Tim dropped me off here. He thinks I'm sick and didn't want me home alone," I said, looking down. He was a really good looking boy and I got the feeling that he wasn't a fan of Angela. Of course, Angela was prettier than I was, so I guess I should be grateful for that, but if everyone dislikes you there's really no point.

"I'd think you were sick too," He said, putting a hand on my shoulder and pushing me inside. Dally had disappeared to somewhere in the house. "You sure aren't actin' like your normal sassy self."

'_Sassy? That word isn't even in my dictionary,'_ I thought sadly. I was normally a friendly, somewhat flirtatious person, but I can't do sassy, or sexy or anything else like that. He lead me over to a couch and I sat down, hands in my lap and my eyes downcast.

"Hey Soda, is Pony at the movies?" Dally called from somewhere in the house. Soda. Another weird name.

"Yeah, he left awhile ago," Soda called from the bathroom. He walked back out holding a thermometer in his hand, whistling. "We'll find out soon enough if you're sick or not," Soda said triumphantly. I wrinkled my nose. It was one of the old thermometers, with the mercury in them. I wasn't sure if they had covers for those, which meant that it had been in someone else's mouth before.

"No, that's okay," I said, moving away from the thermometer that he was now holding in front of my mouth. "Here," I said, grabbing his free hand and putting it on my forehead. "See? That works just as well. Am I warm?"

Soda raised his eyebrows. "Glory, Angela. You _are _warm...but I still think we should use the thermometer."

"But–"

He took the opportunity and stuck the thermometer in my mouth. I tried not to gag and held it under my tongue. I guessed that Soda was looking at a clock in a kitchen while he held it in place. "Alright."

I opened my mouth pretty fast and backed away, all too happy to get that thermometer out of my mouth. Soda shook his head. "Looks like Tim was right for once. Come on, you can stay in my room. When Pony gets home, he'll probably be in his to read or somethin'," He said, pulling me up off the couch and leading me down the hall.

"I'm surprised your brother dropped you off here. Didn't think you were all that close," Soda said in a conversational way as he opened a door and lead me inside. I didn't say anything. I didn't know how close Angela and Tim were.

Soda seemed like an understanding person...maybe I could try and tell him.

"Hey, uhm...Soda was it?"

"Yeah Angela. You should know my name by now."

"But that's just it," I said looking up at him. "I don't. I don't know who any of you are. I know you're probably thinking I've lost it and by all means, you have the right to, but _don't_ know you. I don't know my brothers, I don't know who that blond boy is, I don't even know what day it is."

Soda was quiet for a minute, looking at me as if trying to catch a lie somewhere. He frowned and walked out of the room. He came back a moment later with a newspaper.

"Here," He said as he handed it to me, pointing to the date. June 11th, 1965. My eyes widened.

"Is this supposed to be funny?" I whispered. "It hasn't been 1965 for 41 years. Someone's playing a joke on me aren't they? Aren't they?" I demanded, glaring at him.

"Angela–"

"That's not my name!" I shouted. "My name is Lauren! Lauren Daniels! Okay? I don't know who Angela is! Someone probably thought it'd be funny to dye my hair and curl it and get someone to call me Angela all day, but this isn't funny at all!"

"Lauren?" Soda watched me, concerned. He shut the door to his bedroom, probably so Dally wouldn't hear. "No one's playing a joke on you. If you aren't Angela. . .you sure do look like her. It _is_ 1965. . ." he said in a soothing voice as if talking to an animal. I fell to my knees and held my head.

"It can't be 1965. . ." I muttered. "It can't be. I was born in 1990. My _parents_ were born in 1965," I said looking up at him. Soda looked concerned, but he didn't call me insane yet.

"1990?"

"Yes, 1990. . .August 5th, 1990, 4:00 P.M. in a Chicago hospital," I was frustrated now and it showed in my voice.

"You sure are a long way from home. . .we're in Tulsa, Oklahoma right now."

"Tulsa?" I stared at him. I had family in Oklahoma, but I didn't know where they lived now. I knew in 2006, my Grandmother and sister lived in Bixby, a small town outside of Tulsa. But they had moved there from Illinois when I was a lot younger. I tried to remember my Mom's school pictures.

"Creek...something Creek. My mom went to a school with that name in Oklahoma," I said. "She's probably not in school yet, but I don't think she moved anywhere. But my Aunt might be in that school! My aunt looked like me when she was younger–"

"Lauren. I know this probably isn't what you want to hear, but I'm finding thisreally hard to believe. I think you're Angela, but something happened..." Soda said carefully.

"I'm not Angela," I said desperately. I was starting to cry. "I'm not." I noticed my voice changed. It sounded like me again, Chicago accent and all. "I don't know who this Angela is, I don't know her family or you, but you have to believe me. I'm _not_ her."

Soda looked surprised and grabbed my hand, pulling me off the floor and into the bathroom. He stood me in front of the mirror. Strands of dirty blonde were poking through the brown and my skin was paler. My eyes were blue again.

"See? Do you see that? That's what I used to look like. I was a blonde girl with blue eyes. Do you believe me now?" I turned and looked at him. Soda was staring at me and he had paled slightly.

"Lauren?"

"Yes! Yes, I'm Lauren!" I said happily. "I woke up this morning and I was someone else! I don't know why and I don't know how but–"

"No. . .I believe you now, don't worry. . .just. . .Hey, Dal?" Soda called.

"What? I'm tryin' to find somethin' on TV."

"Come here instead, I need to ask you something," Soda was still staring at me, reaching out for my hair. He picked up a chunk. It was dirty blonde again. Dally appeared in the bathroom doorway.

"What?"

"What color is this?" Soda asked, indicating to the chunk of hair. Dally stared at him for a moment.

"Why? You color blind? It's black, man, it always has been."

"Y-You sure? I could've sworn. . .that it was more like my color," Soda muttered, looking at me carefully.

"Maybe you're the one who's sick, Soda. It's black," Dally said, shaking his head before walking away again. I looked in the mirror and grinned. I looked like me again, but it seemed that only Soda and I could see it.

I touched the mirror and laughed. "I'm me again! I'm really me!" I was relieved, but I could see Soda had the same look that I had a few minutes ago.

I looked nothing like Angela. Angela had been an amazingly beautiful girl. I was average. We were pretty much opposites in a very dramatic way. I realized that Soda was going through the same thing I had been going through a moment before.

"I told you, I told you I wasn't Angela."

"So. . .where's Angela?"

I stared at him. Angela must be in my body. . . "In 2006."

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_Fin. _


	2. Chapter 2

_A bit of a long chapter here. Nearlyfive thousand words. Angela's situation is touched on a little, though I figure she could keep her cool better than Lauren. Anyway, they play a short game of soccer, which is there to sort of show Lauren getting comfortable and then getting the facts smacked in her face again. _

**Edit: **_I recently recieved a review from wopo12 who asked if this would be an OC/Soda romance...er...should it be?_**

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**Identity Crisis**

_Two_

Honestly, I didn't know if Soda had believed me or not, maybe he was just telling me that so I would feel better. . .but he had to have seen my hair. Soda had told Dally he thought it looked a bit like his, which was true, so he had to have seen it. Unless he's just assuming and using the information I had given him.

I was laying in his bed and it was pretty comfortable, though, no bed could ever beat mine. I loved my bed like a family member, but I knew I couldn't really be picky. Besides, it smelled nice too.

I knew that I must have stressed myself out so much that I had started to make myself sick, so I tried my best to calm down. I picked up a strand of my hair. It was black and curly again. I sighed and closed my eyes, curling up and pulling the covers over my head.

The sick feeling came back and I realized I was only making things worse for myself, but I couldn't help it. Everyone thought I was this other girl, this Angela Shepard. . .and I got the feeling she wasn't liked, despite how pretty she was.

No one would believe me, no matter who I tried to tell this time, that I was Lauren, a girl from forty years in the future. I wouldn't believe it either.

I spent most of the afternoon blocking out thoughts of my life before, of what Angela might be doing if she really was in my place and listened to the sounds coming from outside and in the house. A few people stopped by and Soda called that he was going to work but Two-bit was here if I needed anything.

Who ever Two-bit was, I didn't see him. I stayed curled up under the covers.

"You hungry Ang?"

"No," I replied, not bothering to come out from my hiding place. If I stayed under the covers long enough, I would forget I wasn't at home and feel a bit better, but the unfamiliar voice shattered that.

Someone pulled the covers back and I blinked at the light in the room. Looking up I saw a boy with rust colored hair looking down at me. I glared at him.

"Do you mind?" I asked as I reached for the covers. I pulled them back up over my head.

"Glory Angela, never thought I'd see you sick as a dog in the Curtis house."

I didn't bother correcting him about my name. He probably wouldn't believe me. He stood there for a few more minutes before turning and walking out of the room. I felt worse than before and wrapped my arms around my head.

I hated crying, but there didn't seem to be much more that I could do. I didn't want to be another person for these people. I was me, not Angela, and I had no intentions on changing that. I sobbed and grabbed a piece of my hair again. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, praying to what ever God that was listening to make me Lauren again.

I opened my eyes. Black. I grabbed Soda's pillow and stifled a scream.

xxxx

"Gah, who the fuck is Lauren?" Angela screamed into her new pillow, falling back onto her new bed. Who ever this Lauren was, she must have traded lives with her. Maybe she was on a TV show...but all of the stuff she had seen today...

Lauren had soccer practice at the unholy hour of seven in the morning until ten in the morning and during that time Angela had so many unfamiliar things shoved in her face she felt like she really needed to find a bar to pass out in.

Different cars she had never seen, strange new bikes, all of the kids seemed to be wearing tee shirts and shorts and gym shoes, or the girls would be wearing short skirts, up to their thighs and shirts with no sleeves. At all.

When her "mom" had dropped her off at a park several girls jogged up to her and asked her to follow them for stretching.

Angela had never been one for sports, none of the girls she knew were, but there were at least fourteen other girls that were scattered through out a field, stretching, talking, and laughing over music Angela didn't recognize.

She knew her hair was suddenly a shade of blond, along her shoulders and thin and layered, but she found out that she was pretty flexible now too.

But just because Lauren was good at soccer, Angela still wasn't very good at all. A few of Lauren's friends asked if she was feeling alright and the coach barked his own questions at her with the occasional criticism.

The practice ended with a slow jog around the field and a few girls had small square objects in their hands or hooked onto their cloth shorts. A wire led from the object and hooked onto what looked like tiny speakers that went in their ears.

"What the hell are those things?" Angela had asked the girl running next to her. "And who are you again?"

"Lauren, you know what those are. You have one! It's an I-Pod! And I'm Jessica, you know, your best friend? We've known each other since, like, third grade. Are you sure you're feeling okay? You don't have amnesia do you?"

"No, I just have no clue who you are because I've never met you before. I've never heard of a fucking I-Pod and my name isn't Lauren, it's Angela."

"Uhm...okay, er, Ang, what ever you say."

Angela groaned and rolled over on the bed, her back to the bedroom door. She hadn't seen the girls she knew, or her brothers, or any familiar buildings in the time she was here. She hadn't even recognized any of the music she had heard when she decided to give a radio a try.

She had looked at the small, circular discs that were in a large, blue and black case. She didn't know what they were for, but there were colorful labels on them with different names: Panic! At The Disco (Angela had no idea what that was supposed to mean. She wasn't a fan of disco either, so she didn't bother with that one), Lynard Skynard, Linkin Park, Madonna...

"A-ha!"

Angela triumphantly pulled out a disc with the name Johnny Cash. At least this time she had actually heard of him! Now if only she knew how to use it...

xxxx

I sighed and held my stomach as it growled it's protest once again. I was still refusing to come up from under the covers no matter how much Two-bit tried.

He was starting to get really annoying. So I hummed to myself, to block out the sounds of my stomach.

"Hm, hm, hmhm, I'm just a little impaired and I know right now, you don't care..." I smiled, feeling a bit more normal again thanks to music I recognized. "But soon enough you're gonna think of me, and how I used to be."

"Ang?"

I immediately snapped my mouth shut and stopped singing. I wasn't proud of my singing skills, but I could hum just fine.

"Oh, I get it, tryin' to block me out huh? Well..."

I was reminded vaguely of my cousin that lived in Oklahoma. He said "well" while grunting and it sounded like "welp". I had thought he was calling me names the first time he said it.

"Two-bit!" I screeched, as the blanket was ripped right off the bed. Two-bit stood there, staring at me, the blanket still in his hands.

"Uh..." Two-bit began, trying to find something to say.I glared at him as I sat up and reached for the blanket.

"Give it back," I said, my head throbbing from sitting up to fast. Two-bit gently put a hand on my shoulder to stop me from falling of the bed.

"Angela?"

"What...?"

"Uh...c'mere," Two-bit said, dropping the blanket and waving a hand to follow as he walked out of the room. I scrambled after him.

"What? Did my hair fall out?"

"If it did, it was replaced pretty fast," Two-bit said as he shook his head and pulled me into the bathroom and stood me in front of the mirror.

'_Hm, this is familiar_,' I thought, staring at the mirror. "Oh my gosh! I'm me again!"

"Angela...you don't look anything like you. Are we both on something?"

"No! Two-bit, I need you to listen carefully, okay?" I said, looking at him in the mirror. He raised an eyebrow and tilted his head slightly.

"Well, alright."

"Alright..." and I told him. I told him everything I told Soda. But Soda took it a bit better than Two-bit.

"What?" Two-bit yelped, backing up into the wall. "Whaddya mean you're not Angela? Where'd she go? When Tim finds out he's gonna beat my head in!"

"Two-bit! Chill! I'm not sure where Angela is! Maybe in 2006-"

"Whoa...just...what?"

"Two-bit...I already told you. I woke up and I was pretty much 40 years, give or take a few, in the past...in Angela's body."

"And...you're Lauren? Damn...I'm too confused and freaked out to even care that you're a blonde..." Two-bit muttered, sitting on the edge of the tub. I looked around for a place to sit, but I wasn't brave enough to take the chance. I really don't like other people's bathrooms; so I stood, leaning against the sink.

"So...you're like, magic or something?"

"What? No, I just went to sleep and woke up here! I'm not magic at all..." I said, shifting my wait from foot to foot. I was nervous and kept glancing in the mirror to make sure I wasn't turning back into Angela.

"So...er, what's Angela like?" I asked. "If I have to be her for the rest of my life..." I trailed off and bit my lip. I really didn't want that to happen.

"She's your average greasy girl-"

"Greasy?"

"Yeah, ya know, hood...she ain't classy like some of the other girls around Tulsa. Swears a lot, tight clothes, the whole deal," Two-bit said, rubbing his forehead. "You don't seem like her at all."

"Well...swearing and tight clothes are pretty much normal in 2006...skirts that come up to here," I said, indicating with my hand just below my butt. "Are more...greasy."

Two-bits eyes widened. "They're really that short?"

"Yup. And there's underwear where the tag is bigger than most of it. There's a lot of sex I guess. But it's also caused an epidemic called AIDS...it's not that great in the future actually..." I said, looking up at the ceiling. Two-bit was quiet for awhile and I kept running my hand through my hair to make sure it was the same.

"Ya know, you aren't Angel's size at all," Two-bit said suddenly. I blinked my thoughts of a good ol' mall crawl out of my head.

"Huh?"

"You're bigger than she is."

I felt my face heat up and I looked down at myself. I was assuming he meant I was taller than her, because the jeans didn't fit anymore. "Damn..." I muttered, trying to pull the jeans down. They wouldn't move any further than the top of my hips, just below the waist.

"Cool it, I think I have a pair of jeans in my car," Two-bit said as he stood up, stretched and walked out of the bathroom. I watched him go. Alright, so I wasn't Angela's size. So he thought I would fit in his clothes better?

Two-bit walked back in a moment later, holding a skirt instead. "I guess she took the jeans back...lucky for you she forgot her skirt this time."

"Who? Wait..." I said, staring at the skirt with wide eyes. "Oh, ew! I'm not wearing that Two-bit! That's just gross!"

"...I'll wash it first if you like. I would think you'd rather wear this than look like an idiot with her jeans about an inch above her ankles. Or is that normal in 2006?"

I bit my lip and thought about it, shifting my weight from foot to foot again. I sighed. "Alright, fine...but you better wash it like your life depended on it."

Two-bit grinned and pretended to tip a hat as he strolled away. "Sure thing Miss. Lauren."

xxxx

A few minutes later and I was wearing a blue skirt with a white tee-shirt. It fit pretty well, but Two-bit kept staring at my legs.

"Will you stop it?" I squeaked, trying to cover my legs with the skirt.

"Sorry," Two-bit said with a grin. "Most girls don't have legs like those."

I felt myself blush again. "What's that supposed to mean?" I demanded.

"Nothin' they just look real good. Dunno how you do it. You on a diet or somethin'?"

"No, I play sports...I'm on a soccer team..." I said, hesitantly uncovering my legs so I wasn't curled up in a deformed ball on the steps of the front porch. Two-bit cocked an eyebrow.

"Oh really now? Well, that's somethin' new...how about I get a kick ball and you show me what you can do?"

"Uh, well...I dunno, I mean, my first practice since the off season was supposed to be today. I'm a bit rusty."

"Scared? I bet you're really the worst player on the team," Two-bit taunted with a grin. I glared at him.

"Alright, your on. You get the kick ball and I'll play."

xxxx

I stood with the ball under my foot, a bit nervous. I didn't play much in the off season except the occasional game at school. I was probably going to embarrass myself. And in front of all of these boys too.

Two-bit had timed it perfectly. The moment he came back with a ball, pretty much everyone decided to show up at the Curtis house. Surprisingly, I still looked like me, not Angela, so I had to introduce myself. It was a lot easier now that I looked like me...but I kept worrying about what would happen when Tim or Curly showed up and Angela wasn't there.

So, we tried our best to divide into teams. Two-bit and I were captains, which really wasn't fair, because I didn't know who could play or not. I could see him watching one boy pretty intently though from the corner of my eye as I looked at the boys. He would glance over at me every so often too.

Soda stood in between us with a quarter in his hand. "Alright. Ready? Go."

"Tails!"

"Heads!"

"It's tails, Lauren chooses first," Soda said as he picked up the quarter. He leaned toward me. "Pick the third one," he whispered, before walking back to the other boys. I blinked and looked at the boys, counting. One...Soda. Two...a boy with a complicated hairstyle. Three...the boy Two-bit had been looking at.

"You," I said, pointing at him. He looked a bit surprised and maybe even a bit upset, but he walked over. Two-bit swore.

"Fine. Umm...I pick..." Two-bit put a hand on his chin and studied the boys. Apparently they didn't play soccer too often. I looked at the boy standing a few feet away from me.

"What's your name?" I asked with a smile. He looked up at me.

"Ponyboy."

"That's a nice name. I have a bad memory for names, but I don't think I'll have trouble with yours."

"I hope you're good at this game...we really only play football."

My face fell as I looked back at the boys. "Then it won't matter who I pick...none of you can really play soccer."

"Hey, you gonna pick someone?" Two-bit said, shaking my shoulder. I blinked and looked up at him.

"I dunno, kind of hard to choose. For all I know, you could all be awful at this game," I said with a smile before looking back at my options. I didn't know who was a good runner, which was really the most important thing. I didn't know who had good balance, who had good foot-eye coordination...it was a gamble. And I hated it.

"Alright...Um," I narrowed my eyes and started moving from foot to foot again. Soda was still there and so was a small dark boy. I looked at Ponyboy for help.

"Johnny ain't the best runner. Soda's got a lot of energy," He said quietly.

"Okay then, Soda, you're the only other one I know, so waltz on over."

Soda smiled at me and walked over, his hands in his pockets. "I never learned how to waltz," he joked.

Johnny, the small one, hurried over to Two-bits team. "Everyone knows how to play, right?"

"Sure, we've played it at school a bunch of times."

"Kick ball or soccer?"

"Both. Now come on!"

I was could feel my hands shaking and my heart was pounding. I was always like this before a game. A nervous wreck. And because I was captain of my two man and a girl team, I had to start it all off, more than likely. But than a light bulb came to life.

"You do the kick off," I said, lightly tapping the ball to Two-bit. "I won the coin toss. I pick the goal I'm attacking, and I pick the one behind you to make it easy," the goal was two garbage cans. "And you get to start," I said with a shrug backing away. His goal were broken bikes that I had turned upside down to stand on the handle bars and seat instead of the wheels.

That is, if they had wheels.

Two-bit shrugged and kicked the ball. I ran forward, tapped the ball and dribbled it half way down the field. Pony was running a few feet across from me and Soda was covered by Steve. I didn't look back so I didn't know where Two-bit was.

"Pony!" I kicked the ball to him and ran. I found Two-bit. He was in the goal. Soda couldn't get open, which was too bad since he was in the perfect place to make that goal.

Then, Ponyboy did something very pro soccer worthy. He feigned kicking it into the goal. Two-bit moved left, Pony kicked it to me instead and I kicked it in.

"Goal!" I cried, throwing my hands up and running to Ponyboy. I practically jumped on him and gave him a hug. "That was amazing! I didn't think you could pull that off! That's like, professional moves!" I let him go and jumped around a bit, rubbing it in Two-bit's face.

I had the kick off this time and it was another good story. Soda kicked it up too high, so I ran under it, jumped up and had to head butt it into the goal. It hurt; it always did. But it worked and that was really all that mattered. Usually I would miss.

"Are you sure you don't have a concussion after that? Your forehead is all red," Two-bit said, pushing my hair back and out of my face. Actually, we were all a mess since we weren't playing by all the rules. A lot of tripping and kicks to shins were involved. But it was okay by me, soccer was pretty dangerous if you play hard enough.

Of course, the boys were pretty creative too. I was about to kick a goal and Steve, the boy with the complicated hair, ran up behind me, picked me up and moved me out of the way while Johnny kicked the ball to the other end of the field.

It was pretty funny, but it knocked the wind out of me a bit and hurt my ribs. We took a break when Two-bit's team was only behind by two.

The boys were all smoking and they offered me a cigarette, which I guess could be considered polite, but I refused and kept my head down.

"I guess you weren't lyin' Miss. Lauren. You're pretty good at this game," Two-bit said, flicking a cigarette butt away. "But how are you at football?"

"Are you kidding? If I played with you guys you'd probably kill me," I said with a laugh as I tried to wipe the dirt off of my clothes. "I've never gotten this dirty playing soccer. It's usually just the occasional grass stain."

"Yeah, you even got dirt on your face," Soda said, leaning forward and pointing under my left eye. I resisted the urge to wipe it away, knowing it would only make it worse. "Guess we ruined another pretty girl," he said sadly fishing in his pockets. He pulled out a handkerchief and handed it to me.

"Uhm...you haven't used it have you? I'm a bit of a germ-a-phobe..." I muttered. Soda grinned and licked the tip of it, before he grabbed the top of my head with his free handand wiped the dirt off of my face. I squirmed and swore and screamed for a moment.

"That's so gross! That's like licking my face!" I yelled, wiping at my face with the sleeve of my shirt. As the other guys laughed.

"Well, I could have done that but that's just weird," Soda said, putting the handkerchief back in his pocket.

"You looked like he was tryin' to kill you," Steve said with a smirk. I frowned and stared at my shoes. My friends always teased me about being so worried about germs, but I hardly ever got sick and I didn't plan on it. So I tried my best to stay somewhat clean and not use public bathrooms or share water bottles; that sort of thing.

It bothered me, since I didn't think it was that big of a deal. I watched as a pair of boots stopped in front of me and kicked my shoe. Well, Soda's shoe. They were a little big, but Angela's were too small and I couldn't play in flip flops.

"Who's the broad?"

I looked up, blinking against the sun light. A boy with blonde hair looked back at me. His hair was brighter than mine; it reminded me of the little girl that lived down the street from me. She had alwaysreminded me of a doll.

I recognized him, but I couldn't remember his name. I wasn't lying when I had told Pony I'm no good with them. Of course, he wouldn't recognize me; the last time he saw me, I was Angela.

"This is Lauren, a new friend I made," Soda said, throwing an arm over my shoulder and pulling me close. 

"You're all sweaty, Soda, lemme go," I said, trying to move away.

"Eh, you're sweaty too, live with it. So," He said, looking up at the boy. "What're ya up to Dal?"

"Just got back from the store. Got a pack of Kools..." the blonde said with a shrug.

"I dunno why you smoke those things, Dallas," Two-bit said, laying down on the grass of the lot.

Dallas glared. "Since when did you care what I smoked, Two-bit? It's my business..." He looked down at me again. "Man, you've got a weird hair style. Shouldn't you have it all one length or somethin'?"

I felt myself blush again and self consciously ran my fingers through my hair. The layers made my hair look fuller, because it was so thin when it was one length. I didn't think anyone would actually notice.

"My friend likes to try out new hairstyles on me...it used to be longer," I said quietly. My fingers never left my hair. I thought it looked good, but that was in 2006, when everyone's hair was styled beyond belief.

"Ya ain't from around here are ya?" Dallas asked, blowing cigarette smoke down at me. I held my breath and Soda waved it away as best he could.

"Don't do that Dally, she don't smoke. She's in sports."

"I wasn't talkin' to you. I was talkin' to her," Dally said. "So?"

"I'm from Chicago..." I said. My voice sounded so tiny. I thought it was ridiculous, but this boy kind of scared me.

He smirked around his cigarette. "Big city girl...I like that."

I noticed that Ponyboy had gone awfully quiet and wasn't looking at anyone. He just stared down the street as if the cars driving by were the most amazing things in the world.

"Wonder what ya look like without all the dirt," Dally said off handedly, before taking a drag from his cigarette. I lowered my gaze again, my face hot. He turned his attention to Johnny.

"How ya been man?"

"Okay I guess..." Johnny said quietly. Pony had told me earlier that he was always that quiet.

"Yeah? Hey, I was thinkin' of goin' to the Double tonight. Ya know, bum around and see what's goin' on...maybe hit Dingo's."

"Hey, I'll go with ya," Two-bit said, sitting up. Dally just shrugged.

"How 'bout you, Johnnycakes?"

"Sure Dal. I ain't got nothin' else to do."

"Any other takers?"

No one else spoke up.

"Tuff enough. Catch you guys later," Dally said, flicking his cigarette butt at my feet. He smirked and walked away.

"You be careful around him Lauren," Soda said quietly, watching him leave. "He's loyal as hell, but he's dangerous if you piss him off...I think he'll be okay around you though. He knows your with me," he said with a grin. I managed a weak smile in return.

"I just wanna go home," I whispered. Two-bit stood, dusting off his pants and picking up the kick ball.

"I'm gonna get goin'. Try to get some drinkin' in before the Double...maybe give the ball to my kid sister. That is, if you don't want it Lauren."

"You can give it to your sister, I don't care," I said with a shrug. Johnny and Ponyboy had walked off already, probably back to Pony's house.

"I'm gonna see if you got any cake left," Steve told Soda as he stood up and walked off.

"You sure you don't want the ball Laur? I can get my sister a new one," Two-bit said, holding it out to me. I smiled and took the ball.

"Thanks Two-bit."

"Yeah. Don't want you rusty for when you get back home. Ya gotta win all your games," He said with a grin. He waved before walking away. I hugged the ball to my chest and curled up slightly.

"I wanna go home, Soda..." I said sadly. The grass beneath me blurred and I blinked back the tears. I sobbed and held the ball closer. I had the feeling it would be the only thing keeping me from turning into Angela completely. Soda's shoes already felt bigger.

"I wish I knew how to get you back, Lauren...I really do," Soda said, putting a hand on my back. I felt him touch my hair and I sobbed louder.

I was Angela again.

* * *

_Fin._


	3. Chapter 3

_My internet has been down for nearly three days in a row and we just got it back up today. I swear to God, I was losing my mind. Definately went through some withdraws. _

_Anyway, this actually took me forever to write. Weird huh? I suppose I should mention this is really just a story to keep me writing (Nooo, that doesn't mean I don't have some sort of plot) so, that's why I haven't been focusing on this story. Er, check out my Livejournal. There should be a profile for Lauren up there if anyone wants to check it. Link be in the profile._

_On with the show. _

**

* * *

**

**Identity Crisis**

_Three_

When I finally got back to the Curtis house with Soda, Steve and Two-bit were more than a little confused. I was pretty sure Steve was wondering why Angela was walking into the house with Soda at her side and Two-bit...well, I'm not really sure. But he rushed over, grabbed my arm and pretty much carried me back outside.

"Lauren?"

"What? Is there a reason you're rushing me like a football player?"

"You're still wearing your clothes from earlier," Two-bit pointed out, grabbing the hem of my skirt and holding it up. I paled. That must have been what Steve was so confused about. "Man, I didn't believe you at first," Two-bit muttered. "But I really don't think Angela is smart enough to pull something like this."

Two-bit watched me carefully as I laughed. I had the feeling he would be watching me for any signs of anger at that statment for the rest of the day.

"Two-bit?"

"Yeah?"

"...I'm not gonna have many fans around here, am I?"

Two-bit cocked an eyebrow at me and I sighed and crossed my arms, looking at the house next door instead. "I mean...I'm getting the feeling people don't like Angela that much around here. Or is it just you guys?"

Two-bit slung an arm over my shoulder, making me stumble a bit, before leading me to the side of the house. "Well Lauren, Angela is as greasy as they come, remember? That ain't a good thing around here. I'm sure she's got some fans out there somewhere, but, people ain't gonna mess with you. Angela is Tim's sister after all.

"Truthfully though, I don't know that much about dear Angela," he admitted with a shrug as we kept going to the back of the house. He stopped in front of a window. "She's part of the Shepard outfit and I don't know any of them real well."

He removed his arm from my shoulder and picked up a thin piece of metal. Carefully, he wedged it under the window. "Of course," he continued cheerfully. "She has her share of boyfriends and dumped boyfriends. Guys that want her and guys that hate her. Girls probably hate her too."

I watched him quietly as he pried the window open a bit and slid his fingers under the window, lifting it open some while I processed all of this. He tossed the metal aside and lifted the window all the way up, crawling inside. Two-bit turned back to me, a cocky grin on his face. I couldn't help but grin back as I approached the window.

"You expect me to climb through a window in a skirt?" I asked, cocking my own eyebrow. That was one of my little talents. You know the wrestler, Rock? His little eyebrow trick? Yup, I can do that. I didn't realize most people can't until third grade.

Two-bit's grin only widened. "Hey, I promise I ain't gonna look on purpose. I ain't gonna mention it either. On my honor." he said, placing a hand on his heart and raising the other. I laughed.

"Honor?"

"Hey now, just 'cause I'm a greaser don't mean I don't have honor. Come on, I'll help you through," Two-bit said, taking one of my hands to held me steady as I got a leg up on the window sill. I've climbed out of a window once, but it wasn't in a skirt. The one person I do know that climbed in a window back home did more falling through than climbing through.

"See, you're already halfway there and ain't havin' no problems yet," he said with confidence in his voice. "Alright, give me your other hand and we'll get that other leg through."

"Uhm...I think I'm stuck," I said after I had my other leg halfway lifted to the window sill. I couldn't turn without my skirt going up. Two-bit laughed and leaned forward a bit, grabbing my waist and moving me, which forced me to lift my other leg through.

I felt my face grow hot again. I was pretty sure he had seen under my skirt, but true to his word, he didn't mention it or act like anything happened.

I picked up Angela's clothes and was about to change, but Two-bit hadn't left. I stared at him for a moment and he grinned, before I kicked him out of the room. I really didn't think he had _that_ much honor. I heard Tim calling that he was in the house as I pulled my shirt over my head. The door nearly hit me in the face as he pushed it open.

"Watch it," I snapped angrily. Tim smirked.

"Well, ain't you lookin' better?"

"Well, ain't you funny?" I mocked as I walked past him. He messed my hair and followed me to the front door. If Steve was confused before, I think he was beginning to question life itself when he saw me walk out of the front door with a casual wave.

xxxx

That night I realized that Two-bit wasn't kidding when he said that Angela came from a greasy family. She figured that greasers were greasers because of their home life and the Shepard home life was pretty loud. A lot of yelling and a lot of throwing things. At first, I had found it kind of fun, chucking things at my brothers and yelling at them. It felt sort of like a game.

But then Angela's mother would join in, yelling at us for yelling, then her step-dad would yell at all of us to shut up and throw something at us. I had never been so grateful for older brothers I could hide behind.

Not because I was really that afraid of getting hit with something; my friends and I used to throw stuffed animals at each other and as we grew up, it became shoes. Then when we realized those could really do a lot of damage, we resorted to Pinecone Wars.

No, I was a veteran when it came to throwing and getting hit with things. I didn't like the yelling or the way my new Step-dad kept looking at me. Curly had complained and teased me when I tried hanging around him, but Tim didn't snap at me the way he did, so I stuck close to him. In the back of my mind, I sensed that Angela probably preferred hanging around Tim because, no matter how hard he was, he still cared about his two younger siblings.

Curly was just a mean little snot as far as I was concerned. The typical brother who'll stick up for you if someone picks on you, but makes you miserable during the time in between. The kind of brother my friends complained about all the time.

So I sat around in Tim's room while he smoked a cigarette, bouncing the kick ball Two-bit had given me off the wall. "Who'd you get in a fight with?" I asked, almost out of instinct.

Tim sighed, the cigarette smoke leaving his mouth like smoke from a chimney. "One of them Brumly boys...one of they guys saw him bummin' around with Kathy-"

I realized more and more that my sub-conscience was identifying things that I normally wouldn't know. Kathy was Tim's current girlfriend. Apparently, it was an off and on relationship, but I had the feeling it would be off permanently now. I was a little worried that I was starting to think like Angela, that I would turn into her soon if I wasn't careful.

"So I beat the tar outta 'im and ditched Kathy...'course, those Brumly boys aren't bad fighters...kinda sore...Angela, stop it with that ball, it's getting annoyin'."

I threw it one more time, just because I felt it was something Angela would do and caught it, before rolling it into Tim's open closet. "You really upset about Kathy?"

"Nah...she'll probably get picked up by ol' Two-bit faster than she can walk. What's up with you though, huh? You're actin' like the cops are gonna break the door down and haul you away."

"No I'm not."

"Yeah ya are."

"Prove it then."

"You've been attatched to my side ever since we got home."

_Huh, I didn't think he would notice. _I thought as I sat quietly on the floor at the end of his bed. _Hell, I didn't think he would care. _

"What, you don't want me around?" I asked, turning to look at my brother. He grinned and put his cigarette out.

"Hell, I don't care if you're here or not, it just ain't like you to hang around. You ain't gonna get dolled up and go partyin'?"

"Got no one to party with. 'Sides, I really don't feel like goin' anywhere...but you're gettin' kinda borin' so I think I'll go watch TV or somethin'," I said as I stood up. Tim raised a hand in a wave as I walked out of his room and into the living room. The house was pretty quiet, so I figured Curly and my new parents must've run off somewhere.

Which was nice, since I had the TV to myself. Too bad I didn't know what shows Angela liked; I didn't even know half of the shows that were on. I watched an old Mickey Mouse episode, but when that ended, I flipped through again. Okay, so TV wasn't the main source of entertainment these days.

I fell asleep on the couch watching some old movie. It was really boring, which was probably why I dozed off, since I wasn't tired at all.

"Hey, where's your brother, kid?"

I groaned, smacking the hand that was shaking me. "Check his room, stupid," I muttered. I heardhim mutter something about me being a smart-ass bitch before walking away. I heard swearing and someone hit the wall in the hallway, which definately meant that I wasn't going back to sleep anytime soon. I sat up, looking over the back of the couch as Tim stumbled down the hallway, holding his nose.

"What the fuck was that for man?"

"That Brumly boy you beat the shit out of thought I was in your gang and had his damn friends jump me as pay back. So I told 'em I'd beat you up for 'em," Dally spat. Tim glared at him, before tackling him to the floor.

"Ma's gonna throw a fit if you mess up the house Tim!" I called over their swears. "Tim, I'm serious! What if dad comes home?"

Dallas and Tim stood a few feet away from each other, panting and glaring. "He ain't gonna do nothin'. That ol' bastard isn' gonna get onto me for anythin', he's a damn coward."

"He's still gonna get hacked off and take it out on everyone else. If you're gonna beat the shit outta each other go outside."

Dally seemed to be calming down though, seeming pleased with Tim's bloody nose and bruised eye. "Nah..." Dally said, smirking as he wiped the blood from his mouth away with his sleeve. "I don't think Tim'd win against me anyway."

"Just get outta here ya bastard, if ya ain't gonna do anythin' else."

Dally cracked his knuckles as he walked back out to the living room. "There's a party down at the Tiger's territory tonight," he said off handedly as he headed for the door. "Probably gonna be a few good fights down there...and those Tiger girls aren't half bad lookin'."

"Yeah, I'll be there...just get the fuck outta my house, greaser," Tim said as he opened the front door and shoved Dally outside. Dally turned and gave him the bird, before walking away.

"I love when he visits," I said sarcastically, running a hand through my hair, to make it neater. Tim sat down and messed it up again.

"You gonna go to the party or stay at home with Ma and that ol' bastard?"

I stopped myself from shivering, remembering how my step-dad had looked at me. "I'll go to the party."

* * *

_Fiiiiiiin...beeotch. Haha._


	4. Chapter 4

_Lyk, OMG, the divider works! I missed it so! _

_Haven't updated **this **in awhile. But I've had this chapter lying around for a bit. If you haven't already, read my finished story, Running In The Dark. I like it better...and it's finished. _

_Oh, go to my livejournal (link in my profile) and find a picture of Lauren and Angela. Tell me what you think, yes? _

P.S. did you hear the rumors? Outsiders 2 baby. xD

But, who knows if that's true. Just...keep a look out for it. If it's twenty years later and still no sign, find something better to look for.

_**

* * *

**_

Identity Crisis

_Four_

I recognized faces at the party, but that was it. I had wanted to just stick around Tim, but he went off with the boys from his gang, talking to the girls that were hanging around. So I was left to fend for myself, really. The Angela side of me didn't care, but I was feeling more like a Lauren at the moment, so I cared and felt extremely out of place.

This of course was amplified by the fact that I didn't even belong in this time period. But they didn't know that. They still saw Angela; except she was hiding in the shadows and watching everyone, refusing to drink, smoke or flirt. But Angela's lungs didn't seem like those of a smoker, so I guess I was just continuing the fight against peer pressure.

I didn't take comfort in the music either. I didn't really know any of it and it was hard to hear over the talking and laughing and the shouting. It was kind of dark too, so any hopes of even finding Tim were gone now. So I decided to an Angela sort of thing and asked for a beer.

I was kind of surprised at how quick I got one. It was sort of passed down to me and the last person opened the bottle for me, before handing it over and returning to their conversation. I thought it was a little strange, but I didn't say anything and tipped the bottle back. I knew that beer tasted awful and Angela seemed to think so too; until after the fifth one. Then it tasted okay.

Angela's frame of mind seemed to be taking over my own as I walked upstairs which, my own frame of mind knew, was probably a bad thing. But despite that, I pushed open a door, a playful smirk on my lips as I said something. I didn't really hear what I said. My voice sounded muffled, but I recognized the person in the room.

"Angela?"

I sort of stood there and blinked, swaying. I shook my head and muttered more things I couldn't really hear. I stumbled forward and hit a dresser before he walked over and took my arm.

"Who the hell are you?"

I groaned and leaned forward, barely noticing the blond wisps of hair that fell in my eyes. I grabbed his arms so I wouldn't fall to the floor and looked up at him.

"You're that Lauren girl, aren't you? You know your clothes don't fit, right?"

"Dally...can..." I paused the room seemed to tilt slightly and I shook my head. "Curtis house?"

He didn't seem happy with me and pushed my hands away, as if just me touching him would give him a disease and he'd die. "Why the fuck are you here?"

I held my head in my hands. I felt like I was flipping between two stations. Station one: Lauren; Station Two: Angela. I could feel it too. My normaly straight hair would suddenly curl or the features on my my face would change slightly. Dally seemed more than a little creeped out by now and had a firm grip on my arm again.

"What the hell is goin' on with you?"

"Curtis house, Soda," was all I managed to gasp out before Dally dragged me back down stairs and out the door. I was vaguely aware of him pushing me into his car before he sped off, glancing at me every so often as I groaned, hunched over in my seat. It was painful, to be switching between myself and Angela constantly.

I felt the car stop, but Dally didn't pull me out of the car. I heard him jump the chain link fence around the Curtis house and walk inside, shouting for Soda.

"Lauren? Lauren what's wrong?"

I sobbed. My head was throbbing as if someone was beating it with a hammer and my whole body ached. "I don't know."

"Lauren, listen, okay? What hurts?"

"She won't get out," I hissed, realizing what was going on. Somehow, Angela was pushing her way back into her body. But where would I go? I didn't know how to get back. "She's trying to get back in."

_"What are you doing? Stop it! I don't have anywhere to go!" _

_"Get the hell out! I ain't livin' your life anymore, I want my body back!" _

_"I'd give it back if I knew how!" _

I felt the pain ease a bit and my hair changed back to Angela's long curly dark mess, instead of a mix of my hair and her's. I was in a small state of shock, because I didn't realize Soda was calling my name until I felt his hands on either side of my face.

"Lauren?"

I only let out a small "Hm" in response. I wanted to look at him and tell him I was fine now, but I couldn't. Angela had almost made it back. Why couldn't I? Was it because her will was stronger than mine? Was she trying harder? I didn't think I'd ever know and I couldn't ask Soda either. Not only did I lose motorskills of every kind, but I heard a car pull up and knew it was Tim. I felt Soda's hand move to my shoulder and the other at the back of my head.

"What the fuck were you thinkin'?" was all I got out of his little rant, with Soda intervening and trying to explain. I think Tim may have been a little worried when I didn't even look up as he called me names. I don't think I even blinked.

"You think she might've drank too much?" Soda asked. Apparently, everyone knew of Angela's drinking habits.

"Angela, you fuckin' idiot...I tell you all the time to get out of that kinda stuff and you just blow me off like I'm our fuckin' stepdad or somethin'."

"I don't wanna go home," I said suddenly, though, it sounded like I had a mouth full of cotton. But the mention of my "step-dad"... I remembed the looks I had gotten from my step-father. It wasn't something that happened to me before, being looked at like that by an older man. I was always in a group of girls and a few guys when I went out and I didn't draw in attention. I didn't want any now.

I didn't hear what Tim said and Soda gently shook my shoulder, pushing my hair out of my face. "Lauren, are you okay?" Soda asked quietly. I heard Tim shouting for Dally and Darry yelled at him for screamin' in the street when his parents had work tomorrow.

"He looks at me...the way he looks at me...I don't want to go back there. But how am I supposed to tell him?" I whispered.

"Who are you talking about?"

"Angela's stepdad...he...looks at her funny."

Soda looked a bit concerned then and looked back as Tim walked down from the house, wiping a bloody lip. I don't know why he had a bloody lip again, but, I figured it was no big deal. Soda stood up, leaving me in Dally's car, the door wide open. I saw Tim sort of mellow out when he saw the look on Soda's face.

"What's wrong?"

"Tim, did you notice the way your step-dad looks at Angela, or talks to her?"

"He don' talk to her last I checked... he avoids her, when I've seen him."

"What about Curly? Did he notice anythin'?

"Soda, you know Curly and I ain't home most of the time," Tim said, getting a bit irritable. "Why? Is he doin' somethin' to her? I'll fuckin' kill that bastard if he did," Tim muttered, looking down at me. I didn't say a word. The last thing I wanted was to send Angela's brother to jail for murder, because, I believed almost anything that boy said.

"Angel," Tim said firmly. "Tell me."

"C'mon Tim...she probably would have left the house by now if somethin' happened. You know how Angela is."

"Yeah, well she ain't been actin' right lately. Like she's someone else or somethin' and it's gettin' on my nerves."

"...Maybe you should...stay here with her," Soda suggested, crossing his arms, and looking away from Tim to look at me. "If you just drop her at home when she's like this-"

"Angela, did that fuckin' bastard do anythin' to you?" Tim demanded. He seemed to be getting angrier by the second. Maybe he thought I was staying quiet so Angela's step-father wouldn't get in trouble. "Did he?"

"Tim, yellin' at her ain't gonna help!"

"Curtis, if I need advice-"

"Tim..." I said slowly. "Don't make me go back. I refuse to go back."

"Angela."

"Stop it!"

Everything went real quiet then. I couldn't take it. I wasn't Angela...I didn't have the will to face the things she did everyday. I didn't even have the will to get back to my own body...and I think at that moment, I decided that I would have to start being more like Angela.

"Just stop it, Tim! If I don't want to go back and I'm not going back! I'll stay here and you can go off with what ever girl you happened to meet tonight!"

Tim glared at me, and normally, I would have shrunk back and avoided his gaze. But I held it, with my chin high in a defiant manner. He called me a few names and walked back to his car. I sighed as he drove away. Maybe I should have tried acting more like Angela along time ago...I'd probably be home sooner.

xxxx

Angela rolled her eyes as she lay on Lauren's bed. One of her "friends" was babbling on in her ear about some boy and since she didn't know either of them, she didn't quite care. She was more interested in the fact that the phone she was using wasn't connected to a wall.

"Lauren? Lauren are you even listening?"

"No."

"Lauren, what's wrong with you? You've been acting really strange lately."

"Look...what's your name again?"

"...Look, I've been playing along with this long enough, but I've already told you who I was almost everyday. If you don't want to remember me, I get it. You could just tell me, ya know, instead of leading me on like this."

"I ain't leadin' you on. The only person I ever led on was that one-"

"Lauren, stop. I don't know why you're doing this, but I'm sick of it. I'll talk to you later."

Angela sighed as the dial tone started. She pressed the 'End' button and tossed the phone aside. If it were possible, she'd say that Lauren had more drama in her life than Angela did. But she knew that wasn't true. Lauren had a fairly easy life with a lot of overly dramatic friends. Honestly, Angela found Lauren's life absolutely boring.

"And that bitch won't even let me back in my own body..." Angela muttered, staring up at the cieling. "Probably enjoying all the boys that I'm _not _getting."

"Lauren, what are you still doing up?"

Angela groaned and covered her face with a pillow. She really wanted to go back home.

* * *

_Fin. Biznatches. _


	5. Chapter 5

_Filler chapter... Really, random filler chapter. I hate it...but I can't think of anything else. So...SHUT UP! AAAUGH! _

_You can hate this chapter too. **

* * *

**_

_**Identity Crisis**_

_Five_

_I moaned, enjoying the gentle touch making it's way up my leg and to my thigh. It was new...and I liked it. A lot. I remembered movies that my friends and I had enjoyed poking fun at, because the woman was being so over dramatic from just one touch..._

_I should be poking fun at myself right now. The only thing that bothered me was that, I didn't know who the touch belonged to. No face, no voice, just breathing and gasping and moaning..._

_"Oh, God-" _

"Angela, quit yer moanin' it's gettin' on my nerves."

"Huh?" I squinted in the dark, trying to make out who it was that was talking to me. No luck. "I can moan all I like..." I snapped, rolling over on my blankets on the floor.

"Tell me who you was dreamin' 'bout first."

"Nothin'. I wasn't dreamin' about anyone."

"...Hey, if it's someone I know-"

"I'll let you know. Let me sleep, huh?"

"Not if your gonna be getting all excited over there."

"I'm serious, I'm tired."

"So am I. That's why I'm tellin' you to stop moanin' in your sleep. So, don't sleep."

I sighed and lay on the floor. I was pretty sure that was Steve, since Dally had gone off on his own earlier that night. Well, if Steve wouldn't let me sleep...

"Circle circle dot dot, I got my cootie shot. You think that girl is hot? I think I'd rather not-"

"Angela! Jesus Christ, just shut the fuck up!" Steve yelled, before a pillow collided with my face. I was silent for a minute, waiting for Steve's mummbling to stop.

"...You're beautiful," I sang, in the high pitched, scratchy voice that I always used to sing this song. "You're beautiful! You're beautiful, it's true. I saw your face, in a crowded place, and I don't know what to do. 'Cause I'll- Ow! Fuck, that hurt! Get the fuck offa me. Who the hell are you, to be beatin' up on girls?"

"I ain't beatin' on ya, I'm just...tryin' to get you to...shut- Ow! You bitch!"

"I can slap a lot harder, so I dare you to touch me there again!"

My breathing was hard, and I felt the pressure of Steve on me disappear. We were quiet for a minute, but, I knew Steve hadn't gone far. I could feel him sitting close by and I could hear his breathing, see his outline from the faint light coming through the window.

"What were you singin' anyway? I ain't never heard those songs before."

"I dunno. I get around more than you, I've heard 'em somewhere before," I said lamely. We were quiet again and I crossed my arms over my chest, staring up at the cieling. I was feeling kind of homesick again, what with all the singing. I used to sing those songs with my friends all the time. It was weird having a person not know the songs that I heard every few minutes on a daily basis.

It bothered me that I had to lie about it too. If I said, "Oh, in 2006, they're all the rage," he would have suspected I was on drugs, told Tim, and I'd probably...not like the outcome after that. That got me thinking of course. Would Tim do something drastic or just yell at me and make me feel extremely sorry about what I had done (if I had done anything, mind you)? What about Angela's mother? Or...or her step-father?

I was trying to picture a worst case scenario when Steve's light snoring interrupted my thoughts. He rolled over onto my arm and I grunted, yanking it out from underneath him, hoping he wouldn't wake up again. He didn't. I sighed, still pondering over the characters of the people I had been spending the past few days with.

I felt a bit sick when I thought "days" but I managed to control that quick enough. I never really got to know the boys I spend time with very much. To me, they all seemed very guarded; joking around and picking fights and talking loudly about girls and what they've done, or something crazy they did. Not much unlike the boys I was with now, I realized.

But...they were extremely guarded back home. Like, if something was really bothering one of them, I would never be able to tell. I mean, sure, if they were mad at some other boy, you'd know, because he'd be threatning the guy...but anything else, like, sadness or fear. Or anything. It wasn't there. Boys back home seemed very one-dimensional to me.

These boys, these Greasers, they were very...emotional, you could say. Like Ponyboy. I could read that kid like an open book and even when he's spacing out, I can tell that something's going on in there. I can actually take a guess at what these boys were feeling and usually be right. Except for Steve and Two-bit. They were like the boys back home to me, but, not as impossible. Dallas was easy too...he was angry. Simple as that.

Tim however... Well, he was another story. I was having no luck what so ever figuring that boy out. It bothered me. I mean, c'mon, if I have to live with the guy it'd be nice to be able to figure out what he's thinking!

It was around that time I started wondering about Angela. What was she really like...? I sighed again, rolling over and staring at the wall. Would someone wonder what was wrong with Angela if I slipped up and said something wrong? I closed my eyes, Steve's snoring turning to soft, rythmic breathing. It made me feel better, something that normal, and I fell asleep not long after that.

xxxx

"Lauren, I need to talk to you."

Angela bit back a sigh and glanced over her shoulder, holding up her finger to Jessica, before looking back at the boy she was talking to.

"Lauren!"

Angela turned to her, glaring. "What?" She snapped, noticing the hurt look on her face. She wondered for a moment if she should lighten up. She was messing with someone's life, in a sense. Jessica sighed, looking very defeated, before shaking her head.

"Never mind," Jessica muttered, turning and walking away. Angela stared after her, feeling...bad.

"What was that about?"

Angela shook her head, not bothering to even look at the boy. It didn't seem fun anymore.

She had never seen someone so...dependent on her friends. She was like...like a Soc or something. Always having to travel in packs and...giggling over everything or rolling her eyes at people. Why couldn't she just get over it and spend time with her _other _friends? She had done that all the time.

"What is up with girls these days?" Angela asked her self, hands on her hips.

"I wonder that everyday."

Angela rolled her eyes at the boy, before walking away. "Idiot."

xxxx

I groaned as the rest of the house woke up. It was friday and the parents of the household were bustling about, getting ready to go to work. They were nice people, but, did they have to be so loud? It was the summer, for cryin' out loud! You aren't supposed to wake your kids, or any kids, up that early. That, and I had trouble falling asleep last night.

Occasionally, I would get kneed in the back, or Steve would smack me as he moved to get comfortable on the floor...or maybe it was on purpose. I had thought long and hard about that, but, I couldn't come to an answer. After I heard the parents call their goodbyes (they only got tired murmurs in return) I gave up sleeping and sat up, leaning against the couch and running my finger's through...well, Angela's hair.

I wondered, remembering the model shows on TV, if I would be able to cut it as a model with Angela's body...then again, I'm not that good with pictures. I'd probably ruin her whole image. I wondered about Angela's boyfriends...were they mean to her? Did they argue a lot? Did they even really like each other? Or, maybe she liked him, but he just kept messing up...I heard about that a lot.

"What are you doin' up so early?"

I didn't even jump, like I usually do. I felt so dead, but I tilted my head back. Soda's older brother, Darry, looked down at me. I slowly turned my head to the clock on the end table. "Eight isn't early," I said.

"Sure looks like it to me. You got some dark circles under your eyes," he said off handedly, walking into the kitchen.

"...Well, that happens when you don't get enough sleep sometimes," I said snidely. He glared at me and I swore under my breath. Okay, so, maybe I was getting into Angela's character for once. Wrong time to do it, but still. I should avoid sleep more often, until it gets me in trouble.

Normally, I would say sorry, but that seemed very Anti-Angela. "Do you always get up so early? It's summer..."

"Yeah, well, I'm used to it."

"Oh."

My, what lovely conversational skills I have. Sadly, things didn't get much better between Darry and I, but, I did manage to finally fall asleep after Steve left. And, oh, what a wonderful dream I had.

* * *

_-Explodes due to awfulness of chapter- _


	6. Chapter 6

_**Oh my gah!** Another chapter for a story I really wasn't planning on working on. But I was having trouble getting wording I liked for Blindfolded, so I figured I would work on this. And the words just flowed right out. _

_Blindfolded is going to take place somewhere in the eighties, if you were wondering...but I'm still having trouble deciding on things, which may be why I couldn't get wording right. So, hopefully, this will tide people over for the time being. _

**_

* * *

_**

_**Identity Crisis**_

_Six_

"She's still sleepin'?"

"She was up awhile ago. She didn't look like she got a lot of sleep though. She ain't botherin'-"

"Yeah, nobody but her mom. She's been spittin' fire at me for not bringin' her 'poor baby' home. Pretty sure she was as wasted as I was when I got back from that party."

"You went back?"

"Fuck, of course I did. What else would I have done? Skip out 'cause my kid sister is hung over? That ain't the way I work an' you know it. It's her fault an' I ain't payin' for it."

I groaned as someone kicked my leg. Well, I shouldn't say "someone". I knew exactly who it was. "Lay off, Tim," I muttered, rolling over. "I'm tired."

"Spare me the tears," Tim said sarcastically. "Get off your lazy ass and say goodbye to your sleep over buddies. I'm s'posed to get you home. Maybe your mom'll stop throwin' things at me every time she sees me."

"She's your mom too," I said as I looked up at him, before rubbing my eyes with my hands. He scowled at me and made a disdainful sound.

"She ain't my mother any more than Curly's a straight A student. That woman ain't done a damn thing for me s'far as I'm concerned. But one night without you and she just drowns herself in any form of booze she can get. Still her little princess, ain't that right, Angel?"

"Oh yes, of course, how could I forget? Mommy's little princess sits around lookin' beautiful and avoiding love sick boys, while her less than gorgeous brothers go off stealin' hub caps," I bit out, standing up and straightening my clothes.

"Last I checked, I was scorin' more than you Angela, so you best watch what you say," Tim warned, glaring at me. I rolled my eyes but kept my mouth shut. I was tired, I didn't feel like running if I had to. "Jus' get in the car."

"Yeah yeah," I muttered, walking to the door. I paused, turned and gave Tim a mock salute before I pushed open the screen door and walked outside. He gave me a salute of a different kind, of course, in return. Honestly, if he hadn't done anything, I would have thought he was sick, so I wasn't offended by it in the least.

I sat in the car for awhile, gently running my fingers over the dashboard a bit lost in my thoughts. I was thinking how much my Dad would have loved to have a car like this back in my own time. He and my mother were always looking for classic cars. They even entered a raffle (twenty dollars a ticket) to try and win an old '66 mustang. I'm guessing they never won, because I never saw the car again.

I liked cars like that too, of course. Everytime my friends and I would see one on the street or parked somewhere, we'd stare at it for awhile, or ask if we could sit in the car if it was at a park or something. I thought they were better looking than the normal cars I saw around on the streets. It was weird seeing these old cars everywhere I turned.

"You been real jumpy lately."

Startled, I jerked my hand away from the dashboard as Tim started up the car and tore away from the Curtis house.

"An' you're startin' to get more spacey than that little Curtis kid."

"Ponyboy."

"Yeah, what ever," Tim said, whipping around a corner. I noticed he wasn't heading back towards home, but I didn't say anything. "You never space out, unless you're thinkin' about some boy. Is that what's been goin' on?"

"Please, I wouldn't lose myself that bad over a boy," I said, pulling the seat belt across the seat and buckling myself in. I had the feeling it was in my best interest.

"...You wanna know what I think? I think that Curly is gonna be able to concentrate better than you if you don't stop whatever you're doin'. You ain't tryin' those drugs that those hippies been usin' are you?"

"Oh, come on! I'm not stoned, Tim, never was an' never will be! I got better stuff to do than sit around like a vegetable and not shower," I said, crossing my arms over my chest. Tim stopped the car near a field and turned up the radio. I stared out of the windshield, confused. Why would he stop at some random field?

"You used to come here a lot, before they tore the park down. You remember that?" Tim asked, lighting a cigarette and looking rather relaxed.

"...No."

Tim slowly exhaled. "It was only a month ago. I didn't believe Soda when he told me, but I guess you really ain't my sister."

I stared at him, my mouth hanging open like I was some sort of idiot before I closed it. "You knew?"

"It made sense. I started watchin' you more... few days ago I noticed your hair was lighter, but there wasn't anythin' layin' around that you could have colored it with, so I asked Soda about it. He wouldn't tell me at first, said the sun did it to his hair, so maybe it was doin' it to yours."

He paused and took another drag from his cigarette, glancing over at me. "Then last night, when you were sittin' in Dally's car...I asked him about it again. Soda was still stickin' to his story, 'till you looked completely different. He said your name was Lauren... and that you switched places with my sister somehow. Prob'ly thinks some sort of magic deal did it," Tim said, shaking his head.

"I kinda pieced it together. The way you was actin' and how you didn't know who anyone was. Guess you weren't kiddin' after all. You really had no clue. S'plains why you look so lost all the time."

"Why didn't you tell me you knew?" I asked. "I've been actin' like Angela this entire time for no reason? I'm starting to turn _into her _and you knew the entire time that I wasn't her? What if I can't get back now?" I said, my voice rising. "I'll be stuck in this place forever, having to lie about everything I am, because you couldn't tell me you knew the entire time!"

"I didn't know the entire time...I was guessin' before, but I didn't realize I was right until yesterday. I still don't really know what's goin' on either way, so you can't pin this all on me."

I let out a sort of choked sob and hit my fist against the car door in frustration. "I just want to go home! This is fuckin'," I paused, hitting the door again. "Ridiculous!"

"...Look, maybe if you start thinkin' like yourself again-"

"I can't! I start thinking more and more like Angela, remembering all of these...random things and forgetting the things I'm supposed to know...I can't even remember my old address anymore. It's like it was never there."

"...Tell me what you can remember then."

"What?"

"I got a pretty good memory. If you forget somethin' I'll remember it."

"...Why weren't you this nice before?"

"I feel bad for ya, kid. Consider it a pity favor."

I laughed and unbuckled myself, getting comfortable in the seat, before I started telling Tim everything I could remember. He asked about a lot of things and I found that describing some of the things to him made them more vivid and clear and I forgot little things that Angela knew. Like, her last boyfriend, what clubs she could get into and how many times Tim and Curly had been in a reformatory or in jail.

About an hour later and I was having a rather normal conversation with Tim. I think that was the first time I had ever seen him laugh about...well, anything. I wondered if Angela would remember it later. It always bothered her that she had never really seen any of her family happy.

xxxx

"Hey, Jessica?"

"What?" Jessica snapped, not looking up from the book she was reading. Angela pasued for a moment to read the title. "Stargirl".

_'Weird name for a book,' _Angela mused. "I'm really sorry for how I've been acting...It wasn't fair and I guess I was just frustrated with how off my game has been. It's just been a lot of stress, ya know?"

Jessica slipped a piece of paper inbetween the pages and closed her book, setting it on her lap and looking up at her. "But I was kinda upset with you too," Angela added. She had been sitting around when she had suddenly remembered what had happened at a dance Lauren had gone too.

"Why?"

"You remember that end of the year dance don't you?"

"...Oh. That."

"Yeah. That. That wasn't something a best friend should do, ya know. That wasn't something anyone should do. That was low."

"Well...I mean...I had a few drinks before I got there so-"

"But you shouldn't be drinking Jessica!" Angela almost died. She never thought she'd be saying that. Ever. "You're only in highschool!"

_'And I know people who have been drinkin' long before you even knew what it was,' _Angela thought to herself as Jessica looked down, embarrassed.

"I know. It's just...well, with Melissa and all..."

"I warned you about her...her and Danny. But you didn't listen."

"I know and I've felt really bad about it. But since you never brought it up, I thought everything was fine between us."

"...So...I guess we're both to blame for this one," Angela muttered. She had really been hoping that it would just be Jessica's fault. But Lauren was such a wimp that she couldn't even confront her friend about something.

"Yeah..." Jessica said, sighing. It was quiet between them for a minute, before Jessica put her book in her bag on the grass. "Well, how about we fix up your game and then do a good old fashioned mall crawl after that?"

Angela felt the corners of her lips turn in a tiny smile. "Sounds good to me."

"Good, because, you've really been sucking major doo," Jessica said with a laugh, lacing up her gym shoes and leading Angela back to the soccer field.

Angela laughed. "'Major doo'? You need to work on your insults."

"Fine, you play like shit and we need to fix it. Now," Jessica said, giggling with Angela the rest of the way.

_'Lauren really does have it easy," _Angela thought to herself, wishing she were back with her own friends, where they could be giggling about other things. Like things that mattered.

* * *

_Wahaha. Yesh. Oh, made more Sims. Jennifer and the Curtis brothers and Julie and Leann. Mhm. I'm very good with that sort of thing. I feel like such a clod though, I forgot when Jennifer's birthday was. _


	7. Chapter 7

_I dunno, I like the second half of this chapter. _

_Chapter eight is being fussed over... and Blindfolded is being fussed over too. Yup. I'm tired... and it's storming outside. _

**

* * *

**

**Identity Crisis**

_Seven_

"Curly! Stop it! Give it back!"

"Come and get it Angel! C'mon, you want your hair brush, ya gotta work for it," Curly teased with a laugh.

"I don't want my brush," I growled, trying to get away from his hand that was holding my by the shoulder to keep me away from him. "I _need it. _Do you _not _see my hair?"

"Oh, trust me, I can see it."

"Curly! Give it," I drew my leg back and kicked him in the shin. "Back!" Curly swore and shoved me away, before throwing the hairbrush into his parent's room.

"Stupid bitch," Curly mummbled, walking down the stairs (I was able to tell which one he was one by the way it squeaked) and leaving the house. I, however, was staring at the partway open door to the parent's room. I was kind of afraid to go in there. If I remembered correctly, Angela's stepdad would be sleeping in there and he had a pretty short temper, so if I woke him up... I'd probably never walk near that room again.

But I really needed that hairbrush. Two-bit had suggested another soccer game, just me and him, since everyone else was busy. Johnny would probably show up...but it still wouldn't be a real game, just Two-bit and I kicking a ball around.

I took a deep breath and peered into the room. "Shit," I hissed. It wasn't in front of the door. Curly had whipped it to the other side and knowing my luck, Angela's stepdad was just waiting for someone stupid enough to walk in there and get it. And I needed to be stupid or use...my brothers' hair brush. They were one of the few boys I knew that used a brush and not a comb, probably because they're hair was so thick and curly.

Which was why I needed that brush. My hair was just as bad.

"What're you doin'?"

I covered my mouth and jumped, before Tim started laughing at me. "Don't do that," I hissed, glaring at him. I looked back into the bedroom. "I'm debating on whether or not I should get my hair brush from...uhm...step-dad's room."

"Ah," Tim said, crossing his arms and raising his eyebrows. He looked into the bedroom and pushed the door open. "Go on. I'll be right here to back you up," he said with a smirk. I glared at him, but I turned and slowly walked into the bedroom anyway. I made sure to keep an eye on the bed, where I could see step-dad sleeping.

I stopped and held my head, the sudden searing pain catching me off guard. _No, not now...not again._

I stumbled and knocked into the bed, reaching out and stopping myself from toppling over.

"I thought so. You're usually the one causin' the trouble when your brothers ain't around."

"Fuck," I muttered, blinking against the pain and trying to focus in on step-dad's face. He looked rather proud of himself to have caught me. "I think I'm gonna throw up."

He looked at me in disgust and grabbed my arm. He had probably been awake the entire time... that was such an old trick. "You do that an' you'll wish you'd never been born."

"I already do," I said. My speech sounded slurred and my head was killing me, but I managed to smirk all the same. That was the first time an adult had ever hit me. I was in and out of consciousness by then but I was pretty sure that Tim had hit him back for me. I reminded myself to thank him as he dragged me out of the room.

xxxx

"I shouldn't have told you to go in there...I didn't think you'd do it."

"S'my fault Tim...shut up," I muttered. My mouth felt like it wasn't working right.

"...You don't look like Angela, if that's any comfort... you really look nothin' like her."

"I know."

"He punched you in the face... s'prob'ly why you're talkin' funny. Never thought I'd have to watch my kid sister get hit that bad."

"Just...start actin' like the Tim I'm used to."

He laughed. "You look pretty ugly."

"Thanks. I love you too," I replied easily, smiling. It hurt, but I'd live. I've gotten hurt pretty bad in soccer and school before. "Why you bein' so nice?"

"...Ain't right to hit a girl like that... you'd be surprised at how many greasers have morals when they ain't drunk."

"...Two-bit has morals."

Tim was silent for a bit. I guessed he probably had a look of concentration on his face. Kind of like the look on a classmate's face when they're solving an algebra problem. But I couldn't really focus on him. "I guess he does."

"I'll probably be hidin' out here, huh? That's too bad... I was s'posed to play soccer with Two-bit."

I felt Tim's weight disappear from the side of the couch (I recognized the feel of the material, since I had fallen asleep on it once before). Oh well, it was nice while it lasted. I hissed as I felt something on my face. Ice pack and it really hurt.

"Ow," I mummbled, recognizing the squeak of the screen door opening. I nudged Tim's leg.

"S'Dally..." Tim said quietly.

"What's she doin' here all beat up like that?" Dally asked curiously.

"Got in a fight," Tim said easily. "What're you doin' here Winston?"

"Curly's gettin' in some trouble with some of the Tigers. Thought you'd wanna know so you could keep an eye out for those guys. Might wanna keep an eye out for Judy too, unless you want another bottle to the face."

I snorted, a sad attempt at containing my laughter.

"Yeah, it's fuckin' hilarious, you bitch," Tim snapped. I looked at him with one eye open. Finally, I could see a straight outline. I glanced at Dally, who shrugged his shoulders.

"Sorry man, I think it's funny too," He said easily, walking into the kitchen.

"Fuck you, man."

The door's squeaking again. Why has no one fixed that yet?

"There ya are! Damn, it looks like you got hit with a brick."

I sighed. Please, let the ice work it's magic and make the swelling disappear. Just let me cover it with makeup and get over it. Two-bit bent over me.

"She got in a fight," Tim said.

"With who? Brick Man?" Two-bit asked. He never missed a beat... "Lauren? Can you even see straight?"

"Kinda."

"Oh, good. Worried you lost your vision for a second there... Hey Shepard, heard you're in some trouble with Judy."

"The entire East Side know?" Tim snapped at him.

"...I dunno. Lauren, did you catch all that?"

"Yeah, I did."

"Then yeah, the whole East Side knows," Two-bit said with a smile. Tim glowered for a moment, before grabbing his jacket from the floor and storming out of the house. I started laughing, though I really didn't know why. Two-bit looked a bit worried. Maybe he thought I was delirious. Maybe I was.

"What she laughin' at?"

"I dunno...maybe it's you."

"...You better start runnin'."

"Or what? You gonna jump me?"

I winced as Dally tackled Two-bit to the floor. If there was one thing I knew, it was not to tempt fate.

xxxx

Two-bit took me to the Curtis house, claiming that Mrs. Curtis could fix us both up in no time. I think it was safe to say that Two-bit now looked worse than me and my fear of Dally only got worse. But what surprised me was that, after beating the crap out of Two-bit, Dally just stood up, lit a cigarette and walked out the door like nothing happened. He didn't seem to notice his black eye either. And Two-bit sat up, wiped his bloody lip and helped me to the car.

"Won't she ask what happened?"

"Well, you still got your brick story. I'm gettin' in fights all the time... just never came out this bad before. Man, I never wanna fight Dally again. He's like a ball of fire... or a... a... what're those things?"

"...Uhm," I thought long and hard. "Wolverine? Tazmanian Devil?... Badger? Wait...are badgers mean?"

"...Okay, Dallas is not a badger."

I laughed. No, I didn't think he was either. "Is it even an animal you're thinking of?"

"No."

"...Cannon ball?"

"Yeah! Those things hit fast and hard, don't they?"

"I wouldn't know. I've never been hit by a cannon ball."

"Oh right, you only get hit by bricks," Two-bit said with a grin. I smiled. I'd probably feel a bit better if it had just been a brick.

"Lauren...who hit you?" Two-bit asked hesitantly. I didn't look at him, but I felt my smile fall away as I stared out the windshield. "Lauren."

"It wasn't Tim, if that's what you're thinking," I said. I noticed I sounded... hollow. And for the first time in the days I'd known him, Two-bit sounded completely serious. The car pulled up to the curb outside the Curtis house, but Two-bit didn't seem to be in a hurry to get out of the car.

"You still gonna stick to the brick story?"

"...Yeah. I guess I will... or... is there anyone that I could get into a fight with?"

"Honestly kid, I don't know any girls that could leave a mark like that..." Two-bit said. Again, there was a serious tone in his voice that bothered me. I hated that tone, it made me feel a bit... anxious. Step-dad had sounded serious.

"Oh...damn," I muttered, wiping gently at my eyes. Two-bit didn't say anything, but he rubbed my shoulder in a reassuring manner, even if it did feel a bit unsure. "It was Angela's...step-dad." I muttered. "I was getting a hairbrush and... I got dizzy and I fell, and you know how people always reach out to stop themselves? He was pretending to sleep and he grabbed my arm and I guess I said something wrong... I can't even remember it right."

I stopped talking and swallowed hard, hoping to keep any sobs down. I looked at Two-bit with a sigh. He didn't seem surprised.

"...I'm used to hearin' about this stuff but... apparently you ain't."

"Well, it's not everyday you get hit in the face by an adult you know. I've never been hit by my parents in my life."

"Then you're one of the lucky ones," Two-bit said, opening the car door and stepping out of the car. "God must really like you," He added as he opened my door for me. I really wished he hadn't done that. But I didn't want to walk into the house when you could tell I had been crying, so I hadn't opened the door before he could.

"...I guess He does," I said quietly. '_But the least He could do is send me back home...' _I thought bitterly as Two-bit guided me into the Curtis house. Surprisingly, the first thing I worried about was the brothers seeing me like this. I couldn't give a damn, even if I tried, about what their mother thought, it was them I was really fretting over. I didn't want to have to tell them what had happened or lie about it either.

xxxx

Ponyboy was the only one home and he stood outside of the kitchen, silent as a rock, as his mother tried her best to fix up The Two Defectives.

"I just hope nothing's broken. You have such a nice face. Be a shame if it was ruined because of somethin' like this," Mrs. Curtis muttered, her fingers gently checking for any serious problems. I checked out, apparently and she spared me the embarrassment of having a piece of meat on my face. I got another icepack instead, which she said would hold me over until she was done with Two-bit.

He sat, paitiently, as he fabricated a story about what had happened. Mrs. Curtis "tsked" and shook her head, but she didn't question him. I wondered if she believed him... Hell, maybe I'd believe him if I didn't know the real story. If I hadn't been watching it all happen. I suddenly felt guilty.

Why hadn't I done anything? I had just layed there like a veggie and watched in a bit of a daze. That couldn't have earned me points with Two-bit at all... but he hadn't said anything. I decided I'd apologize for that later. I shuddered, the cold of the ice pack finally travelling through my entire body. I hated being cold, but Mrs. Curtis was so preoccupied that I didn't bother hoping for her to notice or bother to ask her for something warm.

"I really wish you boys would just try and lay low around those boys on the other side of town. Maybe you shouldn't make it so obvious that you're different from them."

"Mrs. Curtis! The very thought!" Two-bit said, his voice high and appalled. We both laughed. "C'mon, you know how it is. If we lay down, they'll just rub it in our faces anyway. We gotta stand up to them some how. And I ain't one to back down from a fight. Reflects poorly on the person, I think, if they back out. And Two-bit Mathews ain't a coward."

"I know," Mrs. Curtis said with a small smile. "You're both very lucky. You'll just be sore for a few days, but you'll look good as new in a few days...or weeks," she amended. I bit back a sigh, before someone nudged me on the shoulder. I looked up. Ponyboy was holding a sweater out to me.

"It's one of Soda's, but he gave it to me, so you can wear it..." he explained. He was quiet... but not as quiet as Johnny. Being around Johhny just made me anxious.

"Thanks," I said, hesitating after I had taken the sweater from him. I set the ice pack on the kitchen table and carefully pulled the sweater over my head. I winced as the neck line brushed roughly against my face, but I managed to wait out that pain and gently place the ice pack back on my face. I felt better... calmer. Sweaters always seemed to do that for me. It was like a protective skin, or a shield I could hide behind.

"When I came in, what book were you reading?" I asked him, since he hadn't left yet. He was watching the repairs on Two-bit with a sort of mild interest.

"Just some school thing," He said with a shrug.

"Oh..." I said, looking down at my socked feet. I seemed to be bombing on conversations left and right if it wasn't Sodapop or Two-bit. "You have to read over the summer?"

He nodded. "Book report."

"...Those were always the worst... I mean... I like books but... I don't want to analyze them that much. It takes the fun out of it." Another nod. Damn it, why can't these boys just talk to me? The ones back home do!

"Is my face really that bad?"

That seemed to catch his attention. "It looks ni-" He stopped, his ears turning red. "C'mon, you can see for yourself," Ponyboy said indicating for me to follow him. I looked back at Two-bit, who shooed me away. Well, guess I really don't have anything else to do. I stood up and followed him out of the kitchen and down the hall. He gently kicked open the bathroom door, letting me walk in first.

I was glad the ice pack was there. If my face was really that bad, I at least had time to prepare myself. "One, two, three," I said, deliberately making the space between the numbers short. The ice pack moved and I almost fainted. Ponyboy moved in front of the mirror as I grabbed the edge of the sink.

"Shit," I muttered, leaning against the wall across from the mirror. "Shit! That bastard," I said, my jaw clenched. There she was again; Angela poking through the Lauren.

* * *

_Yeah...whatever. Chapter's done. _


	8. Chapter 8

_Dancing...and musings and a bunch of other things. Mhm. Oh and one of the few tiny interactions with Johnny. **

* * *

** _

**Identity Crisis**

_Eight_

I spent the rest of the morning at the Curtis house with Ponyboy. Turns out once you hit the right topic he could really get started with the conversation, but I was having more and more trouble hitting those topics.

"Hey, Lauren? How old are you?"

"Huh? Oh, I'm sixteen...why?"

"I dunno, I was just wonderin'... I couldn't really guess..." He said with a shrug.

"How old are you?"

"I'll be turning fourteen soon?" He sounded like he was testing that answer. Maybe he was waiting for me to go into a shrieking fit of laughter, fall over, laugh some more and come back up with a smile on my face and say, "No, seriously".

"Are you kidding? I could've sworn you were older than that..." I muttered. I had thought he was my age. He seemed happy that was all I said though.

"Yeah? I thought you were older too."

"When's your birthday?"

"Well... July 22nd, but... I won't be fourteen until... next year."

I giggled then.

"So, wait, you're _twelve_? Oh wow. You sure don't act like it."

It got quiet after that.

I groaned and lay back on the porch that we had been sitting on for the past few hours. It was nice out, but it was cool outside. Ponyboy said it could mean rain was coming and then it would get hot again. Turns out he already knew what was going on with me, which he let me know when I was trying to jump around questions that may be difficult to answer.

_"Sodapop already told me ya know. He tells me a lot of things. He was surprised he lasted as long as he did."_

He didn't ask me much about the time period I came from. Just basic things. Was there anything really different? Well, we have phones that are cordless and can work pretty much anywhere, if you can get a signal. Oh, and we have computers, which are basically super fancy machines that you can use to write by pressing the right keys, and if you're rich enough, you could talk to people around the world with the Internet.

He didn't ask too much about those. It would have confused both of us. What about books? There are a lot of books. A lot, a lot. There's even books where you can pick what happens by picking the next chapter to read. If you mess up, you start from page one again. It took awhile to explain that book, and I wished I hadn't brought it up.

"Music changed too...and so did dancing. I wish it hadn't... my family, the older ones anyway, are always telling me about stuff from this time period and I'm always listening to the music... but no one ever teaches me how they danced."

"How do you dance?"

"Uh, we basically jump in time to the music and uhm..." I paused at this point, trying to find the right words. "Some people uh...get rather close and...well, it doesn't look like dancing. We'll leave it at that."

"Is it really that bad?"

"So bad, I can't show you," I said with a laugh. "Trust me, you really don't want to see it. But there are other dances I know that I can show you. You'd never be able to do them...until the 90's maybe, but, ya know, what ever. It'll be something to do."

So for the afternoon we hung around in the backyard while I taught Ponyboy different dances I happened to know. I'd have to sing or hum the songs so he could get the beat down, but, he got the Electric Slide pretty fast and for kicks, I taught him the Macarena...but I told him to never do that dance. Ever. But, it was really funny to watch. He was so awkward doing it. I had mastered the dance and knew every wiggle and shake.

He didn't ask why he could never do it. He thought it was just as ridiculous as I did and I could tell. I recollected what I had learned in my week of salsa classes I had taken last summer with my friends and a few other hispanic dances that I had learned through the people taking the classes. Those took a little longer, but he agreed to teach me some dances he knew.

It was when we had switched places so I was no longer leading that he seemed to lose confidence. So I did a quick review and he gave it another go. It ended up being a joint effort, if he forgot, I would lead him into the next step. I wondered how odd we looked. Ponyboy was tall sure, but I was a few inches taller than he was, so I had to look down my nose if we were standing close together. Which seemed to be happening more often now that we were wasting time dancing in his backyard.

Soon though, we were just goin' at it, falling over each other we were dancing so bad.

"Hey Pony," A quiet voice said. Ponyboy jumped and pushed me backward as I spun. I managed to catch myself and straighten up my hair a bit, before I met Johnny's questioning gaze.

"Free dance lessons. Want some?" I asked. I sounded a bit winded. He shook his head. The look on his face was on the verge of, "What drugs are you on?"

"Looks fun, but no thanks. I was just wonderin' if I could stay at your house tonight Pony."

"You know you don't have to ask, Johnnycake..." Ponyboy said, hitting him gently on the arm. I think we both noticed the wince, despite how fast Johnny tried to cover it up. Ponyboy just looked at him sadly, but I was on him in a heartbeat, asking him all sorts of questions. When Ponyboy finally got me to let up, Johnny was studying me.

"...You got hit too, huh? Girls shouldn't be beat like that," he muttered. We were all quiet then and I knew Johnny and I were even.

He could touch on tender subjects just as easily as I could. We had a mutual agreement then. Don't ask unless you have the right too.

xxxx

Pony decided to spread the news of the Freaky Future Femme Fatal to Johhny, who looked a bit disbelieving. I didn't blame him. Maybe he thought the world was on a permanent acid trip and he was the only one who could help his poor friends, so he just didn't want to believe Pony. That way, he could talk some sense into him later.

"...The Vietnam war is goin' on right now, right?"

"Yeah," Ponyboy said. He was looking at me, waiting for more, but I kept my mouth shut. Until Johnny leaned forward so he could see around Pony and stared at me too.

"No, you wouldn't believe what I told you anyway. It'll be over in a few years anyway," I said with a shrug, remembering what year it was. "Sorry..."

I didn't know what I was apologizing for, and I stretched forward. I liked stretching. It made me feel better. I was feeling worse and worse; this was the longest period of time I had been myself and I was worried that the next change back would break me. I really couldn't take this anymore.

So I sat there on the porch, feeling isolated despite the silent company, and stretched, thinking of Dally.

_I need to be like him, _I thought. _I need to stop caring about it so much. I need to get a hold of my self and be like him and Angela. I have to let it bounce off of me and have enough will power to get back to where I belong. _

_You can do this Lauren. You know you can. C'mon... get hard. Like at soccer games. Don't look apologetic when you slide into someone and make them fall. If you make it in, look proud and untouchable and don't give that girl a second thought. The only time you care is if they're on the ground screaming. _

_And no one's screaming..._

xxxx

I started studying the rest of the gang a bit more closely and when I'd see them, I'd study the Soc's too. They were kind of like the football players I knew; they'd never make anything serious. Ever. A divorce? Big deal. It ain't botherin' me. But you'd always find out later it was eating them from the inside.

I had to weigh things then. I was always told it was unhealthy to keep things like emotions inside... that it would literally start eating at you. My mother said that if you let it build, and something sparks it, it'll blow, and you'll go with it. Like standing on the top of a building you know is going to be blown to pieces to make room for a new one.

But I'd break anyway, wouldn't I? I couldn't take this much more, having to be two different people. I was willing to change one of those people... but who would I be then? I wouldn't be Lauren. I'd be some one else, with the same name. Like, an evil twin or something. So... hold it off and risk a bigger break or take the one I know is coming?

If I broke I may just end up like the people I've been watching anyway.

I wasn't sure how long I was thinking about this... maybe a few days... and still stretching for that matter (of course not straight days. I slept at some point, obviously), before Dally came wandering up to the Curtis house one day while I was doing a straddle. I glanced up at him, and did a double take. He looked pretty beat up.

"What happened to you?" I asked, before he could slip past me and get inside.

"What's it look like?"

"...Uhm... you fell?"

He stared at me for a moment and I guess I looked pretty odd, leaning forward in a straddle with my arms out in front of me, my fingers tapping the porch floor. I was thrilled, actually. During those days of thinking I mentioned, I was still Lauren. So the break wasn't as close, maybe. I was wondering if Angela had only managed a half way this time. He smirked and shook his head, before walking inside.

"Nice talkin' to you too," I called, knowing he'd hear me through the screen door. I'd been spending my nights at the Curtis's actually. I couldn't go back with Tim, since I wasn't Angela, but he told me that her mother hadn't even noticed this time. I said maybe she heard about me getting hit and figured I'd be avoiding home for awhile. He didn't say anything to that, but he shrugged, saying he had to go do... well, what ever it is he does. I wasn't really listening.

I stopped stretching for a moment and pulled my legs back toward me.

Dally or Lauren...?

Negative or Positive?

I still couldn't decide who I should be. I think I was realizing more often that there wasn't always an inbetween. You are or you aren't. I couldn't find the gray in this town...

I wondered if anyone knew where it was... and then I wondered if I should put up a 'Missing' poster. Of course, I wondered why I was so stupid after that.

* * *

_Mhm. Leave a review, tell me what you think could be better or what you liked. _


	9. Chapter 9: Part One

_This chapter was getting lengthy, so it's cut into two parts. The boring and the slightly interesting. Oh, the joy. : )_

_Just, keep in mind that this story is mostly writing practice and a "fun" story. It's not serious like Running or Blindfolded. So I don't put as much consideration into this one as those two. _

_But I like writing it, so it's not a shit story, it's just... got no real plot. Haha... yeah. But don't worry, it's not going to rambly. It'll probably be over sooner or later. Maybe. _

_Glad that the readers like it though..._

_**Edit: There was one time mistake and I'm going back to check for more. I guess I should put some more attention into this. xD

* * *

**_

_**Identity Crisis**_

_Nine: Part One_

"Hey, Steve, can I ask you something?"

"As soon as you get your ass offa that car. I can't fix it with you on it."

I slid off the hood of the car that was sitting in the garage of the DX. It was one of the few gas stations I had seen that could fix your car, then make you pay for gas afterwards. I watched Steve pop open the hood, open it, and look inside. I looked too, of course, but I didn't really like cars, so I wasn't too wrapped up in it.

"You gonna ask?" Steve questioned, looking up at me.

"Well," I began, and Steve looked back down at the car. "You're a... mean person, right? Like, not to me or anything but to other people?"

"...You don't have to worry 'bout insultin' me. I know people think I'm a jerk," Steve said, reaching into the mess of mechanics in the car.

"Uhm...anyway, you probably don't feel _too_ bad after you're mean to someone, right?"

"Lauren, you gonna tell me what you're gettin' at sometime today?"

"I need help being more like you or Dally, ya know? Like, if I was a bit tougher, like you guys, I'd have an easier time here. Dig?"

_Dig..._

That was definately something that had rubbed off on me over the weeks. Instead of "Ya know?" it was "Dig?" or "Ya dig?". I felt like the biggest dork in the world when I said it, but it was apparently cool then, so I didn't have to worry.

Steve looked up from the car, his gaze hard. "I ain't doin' that to ya Lauren. You don't wanna be like me or Dally, _especially _not Dally."

"But I don't fit in here Steve. It's not the same for me as it is for you. Yeah, you don't fit in with the Socs and all of that, but I don't fit in with _anyone_. You have other greasers, I have _no one_. I'm just that creepy girl who's from the future... or the creepy girl who needs to be locked away."

"I'd go with the second one myself," Steve said with a shrug, working again on the car. I glared at him, but he didn't seem to notice.

"Alright I get it, my story is unbelievable. I've already heard it before," I snapped. "But if I'm gonna be stuck here..." I paused, wondering how that would work. If I was Lauren now and I was stuck here as Lauren... would that change the future? I know, it's not going to change the world, but, if I hit that point where I would have been born, would there be two Laurens? Would the process repeat itself with the new Lauren?

"Darry was wonderin' what would happen if you stayed. Is that what you're thinking about?"

"It's really complicated... if I stay, I'd eventually hit the time I was born... in thirty years, sure, but I'd still hit it. I can't even imagine what would happen then..." I muttered. I was distracted then, from what I had originally been planning.

The good news was that I had thirty years (give or take a few) to get back. The bad news? I'd have been _missing _for almost thirty years and be about 46 by the time I got back. How would I explain where I was?

This wouldn't be a problem if I was Angela and Angela were me, because neither of us would be missing. We'd just have to fall into our new persona and there'd be no problem.

So, if my parents file a missing person's report and Angela's parents actually realize they should, there'll be two people, close to the same age, that went missing the same day and time. True, different states and different years and no one will probably connect it. But if we both disappeared the same way (which we did)...

I was overanalyzing this.

"You hungry? You've been bummin' around all day and I haven't seen you eat a damn thing."

"Huh?" I looked at Steve, who was wiping his hands on a dirty rag. How that helped clean his hands, I had no idea.

"Darry or Soda usually stop by with food or somethin' since I don't have much time to take off if I want all the money I'm workin' for. But they didn't drop by today, so they must be busy."

"And?"

"How 'bout you go back to the Curtises', get somethin' to eat and if you still feel like comin' back, come back."

"I'm getting in the way, aren't I?"

"Yeah."

"Alright. I guess I'll see you later then," I said with a shrug, walking out of the garage and away from the DX. It wasn't too far of a walk for me, after marching a mile when, once upon a time, I was a baton twirler, and running like a maniac in soccer, so I didn't mind that I didn't have a ride (mind you, I was an awful twirler compared to everyone else. It would always hit me in the head or I'd throw it to far. That's why I'm in soccer).

I was just nervous that a Soc would drive by or something. Usually, I wouldn't look like a Greaser, but with my fading bruises (now on various parts of my body from rough housing), and clothes that Two-bit got from his Greaser girlfriends or from shoplifiting... I was a bit on edge. I hoped that my lack of makeup and blonde, boring hair would throw them off if I saw them.

Unluckily for me, I did see one of their cars, but the worst I got was name calling, before they drove away laughing. I was on guard for the rest of the walk, in case they came back.

"Hey!"

I jumped and looked toward the street.

"Don't do that Darry, I just saw some Socs-"

"I'm sorry. Just get in the car, I don't need you gettin' harrassed by them anymore than you have to."

I gladly jogged around to the other side of the car and climbed in, sighing and leaning back as I buckled myself in. "Thanks Darry. Steve kicked me out of the garage so..." I said with a shrug. I never had much to say to Darry. He was so much older than me, since, he was technically an adult and I was still stuck in high school.

"I know, I drove over there to get ya and Steve said you had left already. I knew you wouldn't leave on your own, so I figured he had told you to get outta there. I was kinda upset with him... he wasn't thinkin' when he sent you outta there."

"Well, a lot of people don't think about things before they do them. Sometimes they think about it afterwards and realize how bad they fucked up and feel guilty about it," I said, looking out the window. "Is that Johhny?"

Darry slowed down and leaned forward, looking out my window. "I think so. What's he doin' this far out?"

"Well, I'm sure he goes to places other than the lot, his house and your house," I said, thinking that was a common sense sort of thing.

"He doesn't walk this far out alone. Not alone anyway. It ain't really safe."

I felt a bit queasy and I rolled down the window a bit. I kept imagining what may have happened if we hadn't spotted him.

"Call 'im over, will ya?"

I nodded absently, taking a deep breath to get any images of Johnny bleeding all over the ground out of my head. "Hey! Johnny!"

He jumped and looked at the car, the usual suspicion in his eyes, but once he recognized the car and my slightly bruised face, he wandered over, his hands in the pockets of his jeans. "Hey," he said, making eye contact for less than a second.

"Need a ride? You'll be hitchiker number two," I said with a small smile. He nodded and got into the back of the car. I noticed that even his movements were silent.

"What were ya doin' over here Johnnycake?"

"I dunno... I was just gonna see what Steve was doin' I guess," He said with a shrug.

"He probably woulda kicked you out," I said a bit hatefully. "I was gettin' in the way, so he sent me off on my own."

"With those Socs drivin' 'round?"

"They just called me names. I ignored them. Don't think they realize I've heard worse," I said, picking at my fingernails. The car grew silent again and I was all too happy to get out of the car once it stopped at the Curtises'. I raced Darry to the door (one of the few nice gestures I had gotten from him), but since I had taken a head start, I was the unlucky one to crash into Dally as he was leaving the house.

"Watch where you're fuckin' goin' you..." he paused, looking down at me as I quickly backed away running a hand through my hair. "You're that crazy girl, aren't you?"

"I'm not crazy," I snapped.

"That's usually what they say, ain't it?"

"Lay off, Dally," Darry said a slight warning in his voice. Johnny slipped past us and went inside, probably hoping there'd be lunch lying around.

Dally raised his hands in a sign of "hey, no problem here" and shouldered past me as he made his way off the porch. I didn't bother saying anything, so I slipped inside as I heard Dally stop to talk to Johnny. Sure, the mean guy can have a decent conversation with him, but I couldn't. That's fair.

"Hey Miss Lauren."

"Hi Two-bit," I said, my enthusiasm a bit less than normal. Ponyboy was sitting in front of the couch, since Two-bit was laying across it, so I sat down next to Pony.

"Your hair is getting darker."

"Two-bit!" Ponyboy yelled, turning and punching him in the side. Two-bit grabbed his side, wincing.

"Sorry, Lauren, I didn't mean to make ya upset or anythin'. I just thought-"

"It's fine."

"Are you-"

"It's _fine_," I snapped, turning to look at him. "So stop worryin'."

"Sorry Angela."

I glared at Two-bit then, stood up, and stormed away, though I was well aware of Ponyboy calling me back and asking Two-bit why he had to do that.

xxxx

Angela screamed loudly, causing Jessica to drop her eye liner on the floor and nearly knock over her small vanity in her room as she ran to the bathroom.

"Oh... Angela, I'm sorry," Jessica said, looking at her hair sadly. It was bright blonde and was back up to her shoulders. Angela looked at her, sadly.

"I really wish your friend would just let me go home, dig?"

"Well, I can't tell her what to do from here, Ang... she probably has no idea how to get back."

"Or she just doesn't want to leave. Probably enjoyin' all the attention she's gettin' as me. I mean, I haven't gotten one double take or second glance or anything since I've been Lauren."

"I doubt it. Lauren isn't one for attention. Hey, ya know what, how about we go to a party? I was invited a while back and so was Lauren and since you look like you could use some cheering up..."

xxxx

"Think of it as Two-bit's way of apologizing."

"I've already been to one party and I didn't exactly enjoy myself."

"Lauren..." Ponyboy whined. I narrowed my eyes. He was doing that on purpose.

"Pony," I whined back. He sighed and bit at his fingernails.

"I'll be there. So will the rest of the gang. You can avoid 'im if it's really that big of a deal."

"That ain't it," I muttered, crossing my arms and kicking at the dirt. I watched a strand of dark hair fall in front of my eyes, but held any emotions back. _Think of Dallas. _"I don't feel like going. 'Sides, I'm surprised your parents are even letting you go."

"Well, Soda kinda convinced 'em for me."

I snorted. Of course. They were the only brothers I knew that didn't hate each other and threaten to beat each other's heads in. Instead, they helped each other out.

"Well, Tim was lookin' for ya. He's been checking by the house to see if you were... ya know, Angela again. So, I dunno. You could always try to look for him."

I smiled a bit, and shook the hair out of my face, crossing my arms. "I'll go look for him... and maybe I'll catch up with you later, okay?" I said, waving to Ponyboy in a bored sort of manner.

I walked around to Tim's usual places (ones that I had learned over the time stuck here) but he wasn't there.

"Still got the Dingo," I muttered, changing my direction, and keeping an eye out for Angela's brother. Plenty of fights. So I peeked in the crowd, looking for Tim.

"Hey."

I jumped and whipped around, fist raised. "Oh... Dallas... do me a favor? Don't do that."

"If your lookin' for your brother, he's inside... so, is the gang tellin' the truth?"

"Huh?"

"About where you're from," Dally said, a bit annoyed by my slow thinking.

"Shh! I really don't need everyone knowing," I hissed, waving my hands in front of his face. Somewhat. He was a bit taller than I was now that I was Angela. "Yes, it's true, but-"

"You're still crazy."

"Dally!" I shrieked, hitting him in the arm.

"I should get you to beat up my buddies more often."

"Yeah, 'cause gettin' your kid sister to fight for you is real tough," Dally muttered. Tim messed up my hair and blew cigarette smoke in Dally's face. "You know I hate your smoke," Dally said bitterly. Tim smirked.

"Still Lauren in there?"

"Yeah."

"That's too bad... thought you would have made it back to where ever you came from by now. Whaddya want?"

I shrugged. "Pony said you was lookin' for me, so I decided to make the lookin' a bit easier." I realized how quick I could slip into Angela. I didn't even speak the same.

"Yeah, I was. You're kinda hard to track down. You ever stop movin' around?"

"Keeps me busy. I'm usually in the lot-"

"Yeah, playin' soccer. Not really a typical girl thing, soccer," Dally pointed out. I rolled my eyes. "Why you play it anyway?"

"'Cause where I come from, everyone plays sports."

"You play against guys?"

"No."

"Then what's the point?"

I sighed. "I really don't feel like explainin' anythin' to you."

"Pony ask you?" Dally asked suddenly as Tim wandered towards a fight. It was probably one of the members of his gang and since it was his job to keep them in place, he was probably making sure they weren't starting an all out war.

"Ask me what?"

"I dunno, I walked inside to get somethin' to eat and he's talkin' to Soda about askin' you somethin'. Think he said it would cheer you up."

"Oh. Yeah. Some party or... dance or something. He asked if I wanted to go with all of 'em. I don't really feel like it."

"But you'll go to a Tiger party? Jus' go. You ain't got nothin' better to do," Dally said, before walking away. I watched him go and glanced back at Tim who was now in the fight.

"He won't miss me too much," I said to myself, before walking back to the Curtises'.

xxxx

"That's what you're wearing?"

"Well... yeah. Jeans and a nice shirt are kinda the norm. And if my mom sees us walkin' out with short skirts on, she'll skin us both."

"We'll stash 'em," Angela said with a shrug, pulling a shirt over her head, grabbing a skirt and stuffing it into Jessica's rather large purse. "Here, hand me that skirt over there," Angela said, pointing to the floor as she pulled on a pair of jeans she borrowed from Jessica. Apparently, Jessica and Lauren wore that same size.

"I dunno Ang. I don't think it's such a good idea. I mean, now we'll have to watch the purse and make sure no one steals it."

"I doubt anyone will steal your purse at this party. You wanna get your purse stolen? Go to one of the party's I used to go to. Spiked drink included."

Jessica sighed, but handed her the skirt, which Angela stuffed into the purse. "Alright... so... now we need to cover it up," Angela muttered. She walked over to Jessica's small vanity and dumped some make up in, her house and car keys and some money. "There. Now, if your mom asks, we'll tell her that we might go out to dinner if we get bored with the party... where's that little phone you like so much?"

"My Razer?"

"...Your phone."

"That's what it's called. A Razer, because it's so thin."

"Just give me the pink square so we can leave," Angela snapped. Jessica handed it over and Angela dropped that in the purse too. "Oh, wait, you might need these," she said, handing Jessica her keys.

"How old are you again?"

"Lauren's sixteen."

"I know that."

"We'll just say I ain't sixteen."

"Excuse me?"

xxxx

"I'm glad you're going. I'm sure you'll have fun. It's just a dance and most of those dangerous types don't hang around those."

"Yeah, sure," I muttered, carefully dragging the eyeliner pencil across my lower eyelid. It was a bit weird to have Pony standing there watching me and people walking in and out of the bathroom to grab random things. Like toothbrushes. Or a comb. Or a roll of toilet paper. Which of course gave me the impression that we would be trashing someone's house, but I didn't say anything.

I doubted that these guys would do something as... well, low key as that.

"I figured you could learn some of those dances that you were so keen on learnin' before. And I'm sure if Sandy don't mind, Soda could teach you too, 'cause he knows more about dancin' than I do."

"Sandy?"

"Yeah, she's Soda's girlfriend. She's real nice. Has pretty eyes too."

"Well, ain't she lucky?" I muttered, moving onto the next eye.

"I guess she is. Lots o' girls are jealous of her, but she don't seem to care."

"I don't think I would care either, if I bagged Mr. Movie Star. You got a girlfriend?"

I watched as Pony's ears turned red. "I ain't to keen on them yet. And Johnny and I are kinda scared of 'em after what Steve told us."

"Maybe it's just because your both really shy. Girls ain't that scary."

"The one's I know are."

"Like me?"

Pony's ears turned even redder. "No, that ain't what I meant. Sandy ain't scary either. But if you see Evie and Sylvia... lots of greaser girls are kinda scary."

"Well, you're 13. You're supposed to be afraid of girls. 'Cause you really don't need one right now anyway. Just a bunch of drama and kissing."

"You got a boyfriend?"

"Had. But, like I said, it was just a bunch of drama and kissing. My grades started slippin', so I broke it off... or... well, he broke it off with me, because he thought I was cheatin', 'cause I wasn't spendin' enough time with 'im or somethin'. What ever. He wasn't that great. And my grades shot right back up and he got a cheerleader, so it's good."

"...Wow," Pony muttered, watching me put mascara on. I smiled a bit, wondering if he was that amazed by mascara, though, I knew that's not what he was commenting on. Personally, I hated mascara. It always smudged. But since Angela wears it, I had to put it on. I nearly poked my eye out as Pony bumped into me because Steve and Soda knocked into him. I sighed, and finished quickly, before slipping past them to get out of the way.

I could still hear them fighting as I walked down the hall.

"Hey, boys, cool it, huh? Use that energy for the dance," Mr. Curtis said, smiling as the boys broke apart and grudgingly walked into the living room. I laughed; they were all fixing their hair. Mrs. Curtis walked down the hall, smiling at me and smoothing down my hair as she walked past. A loving gesture I missed.

"Since everyone is running away tonight, we're going to enjoy ourselves and go out. So don't panic if you get home and we aren't here. We'll call if we won't be back before 12, okay?"

A loud chorus of "Sure", "Okay", "See ya later" and Two-bit's, "Use protection" (which caused laughter and a little talking to) they said goodbye and left.

"Steve an' I are gonna pick up Sandy an' Evie. You guys okay goin' with Two-bit?"

Of course, 'you guys' was Ponyboy, Johnny and I. I was ready to protest, but what would I do then? Walk?

"No," we said. Two-bit grinned.

"Alright, Lauren, you can sit in the front. Pony, Johnny, I need a push."

"... Wait... what?"

* * *

_I feel like eating this chapter so it will never be seen again, but I can't eat a computer file and it's kinda good. So, eh. Have fun._


	10. Chapter 9: Part Two

_Yeah, here it is. I wasn't in a mood to describe the entire party. That stuff bores me, so I got right down to the good stuff. Inspired by Artemis, who spurred a thought that made this chapter better than I had originally planned. Hooray!**

* * *

** _

**_Identity Crisis_**

_Nine: Part Two_

"I can't believe this car is still one piece," I muttered. Two-bit grinned.

"So am I, but it gets me to where I need to be and it ain't killed me yet. So I reckon we'll be safe. Ain't that right guys?"

Pony and Johnny glanced at each other, but didn't say anything. Two-bit frowned. "Guys?"

I started giggling. "Aw, c'mon guys, it ain't that bad, is it?" Two-bit asked, glancing back at them.

"Uh..." Pony said, floundering. "It's nice out tonight, ain't it?"

I let loose, falling to pieces. I couldn't stop laughing no matter how hard I tried.

xxxx

Turns out Two-bit doesn't always have to drink to have fun. He didn't touch any for the entire first half of the dance, which Soda said was a pretty big deal. I danced with a lot of people, until Pony warned me that my hair was getting lighter. I had to duck out of sight and wait for the brief pain to pass before I could go back out to the party.

I took the time to think about some things. I guess the party was spurring Lauren instead of Angela. These must not have been her type of party. Which must mean that I'd be safe at this party... er... dance. I'm pretty sure it was just one of those community dances that I used to go to when I was in junior high.

I giggled a bit. I felt so stupid, being at another one of these. I usually just hit the movies or when to a local show. I hadn't been to a community dance in almost three years. I sighed and relaxed a bit. I was hiding out in a back room I had found in the place the dance was being held. The music wafted it's way through the walls, as did, the laughing and talking and excited screams. It was nothing like the parties I was used too. I blew a strand of black hair out of my face.

xxxx

Angela winced at the loud music that was beating it's way through her body. Jessica didn't seem fazed, talking and laughing already. She weaved through people that were all over each other like it wasn't unusual to see girls dancing that close together, or to see people rubbing against each other and making out in time to the music.

"What the hell are they doing?"

Jessica glanced over. "They're dancing."

"...What the-"

"It's called grinding. It's not really dancing but... ya know what, I'm not gonna bother. I know it looks stupid and that's because it is."

"I'm so impressed," Angela said sarcastically.

xxxx

When I finally decided to slip back into the dance, it seemed like someone had put a wall in the middle of the dance floor. Of course, the Socs showed up. I looked down at my clothes. Short, because Angela's clothes were very limited when it came to length. And since I looked like Angela, I guessed I would have to be careful of where I walked.

"Lauren! Over here!"

I weaved throw the dancing (and glaring) couples, smiling at Ponyboy when I finally reached him. "We were worried you got caught up with some Socs."

"No, just hiding out for a bit. When did they get here?"

"Few minutes ago," Pony said, his face darkening. "I keep waiting for some to start a fight. They've been throwin' it back and forth for a while now, but no punches yet."

"Should I bolt if it starts?"

"Nah. You'll be fine. No one's ever beat a Curtis and Steve, Two-bit and Johnny can hold their own in a fight. Just stay outta the way and don't lose sight of us, if somethin' happens."

"...Is Darry going to come?"

"I don't know. He said he'd try, but he's with his own friends tonight," Pony muttered, looking at his shoes.

"Hey, don't worry. It's no big deal. Older siblings do that sometimes. That's what my friends tell me. Most of them are happy about it, because then they aren't telling them what to do."

"Sounds like you don't have very good family relationships in the future."

"No, we don't."

I was thinking about what else I could say when my head started spinning. "Oh no," I mummbled, grabbing onto Pony's shoulders so I would fall over.

"Lauren? Lauren!"

xxxx

"Shit!"

"Someone catch her!"

"Ang- Lauren? Hey, c'mon, wake up."

xxxx

"Lauren? Hey, there ya are."

"Curtis?"

Soda frowned, glancing up at the gang crowded around him, before looking back down. "...Angela?"

"I'm back? I'm really back?" Angela asked breaking into a grin. The music wasn't as loud as it had been a moment ago and the people around her were just dancing, nothing else. Unless you counted the people standing to the side and making out, but at least it wasn't in the middle of the dance floor.

"Finally, I was really sick of that place."

xxxx

I groaned, rubbing my eyes with my hands as someone shook my shoulder.

"Hey, she's waking up."

"Someone get Jessica in here, huh?"

"Are you okay?"

I blinked a few times and looked up, trying my best to focus on the face above mine. "Jess? Where am I?"

"...Lauren? Laur, is that you in there?"

"Yeah, I think so."

Jessica squealed and hugged me, making the blood rush to my head. I sighed and enjoyed the hug. "I was so worried about you. What do you think happened? Where were you?"

"I was like... fourty years in the past."

"What?"

"I dunno how I got there, but I swear to God, that's where I was. How was Angela?"

"Oh, she didn't take to the future too well. How'd you handle it, being that far back? Did you see your Grandparents? Your parents?"

"No, I didn't see them," I said with a laugh. I could feel the bass of the music in the room I was in. "Are we upstairs?"

"Yeah. You remember that party we got invited too?"

"...Are you serious? I'm in Jacob's bedroom?"

Jessica giggled and let out a little squeal. "Yeah!"

"Oh my God," I said, laughing and looking around the room. "Oh my God! Damn, if he only he were here with me."

"I know right? That'd be the only thing we'd talk about for a year... I really missed you Laur. I was so scared, because you came to soccer practice and you were _sucking _and you didn't know who I was and you were saying, 'I'm Angela, who the hell are you?' I didn't know what to think, until I realized, 'Hey... she really isn't Lauren.'"

"Yeah, I kinda had the same treatment in the past. I met the cutest boys though."

"Too bad I couldn't have come with you! They're all old now," Jessica said, making a face. I laughed. "Who knows though, maybe they age well, huh? Like all of those movie stars."

"Maybe. One 'em kind of looked like a movie star. Absolutely gorgeous."

"Yeah? Go on, tell me more, huh?"

xxxx

"You think Lauren made it back okay?" Pony asked Two-bit, who was watching Angela carefully.

"I dunno. I'm kinda surprised she's not in there anymore. I keep waitin' for her to change back."

"... She was nice."

"Yeah, I guess she was," Two-bit said with a shrug.

"Kicked your ass at soccer."

"Yeah, but she couldn't catch for shit," Two-bit said, laughing. Soda seemed just as bothered by the sudden change as Two-bit and Pony, but Johnny hadn't said a word. He hadn't really known Lauren that well, so Pony couldn't imagine him being affected by her leaving.

"Maybe we should have taught her how. Yeah, maybe. Too late for that now."

"I guess-" Ponyboy stopped, watching as Angela suddenly stopped dancing. He noticed that her eyes looked empty and he thought he saw something like cigarette smoke floating up to the cieling above her. Two-bit, how ever, suddenly wasn't there. Pony blinked and watched the older boy catch Angela as she pitched forward.

xxxx

I almost started screaming when Jessica's face became blurry again. I reached out and grabbed her hand, hoping it would keep me anchored down or at least bring her with me. I didn't want to be stuck there alone, not again. It didn't hurt this time, which confused me. I was so used to the pain... so where was it now?

_"So, you're Lauren."_

I looked down. I was standing up now and Angela was standing in front of me. Jacob ran into his room, right through Angela and me. I think we both got a scare out of that one; I yelped and she shuddered. I looked over my shoulder. Jessica and Jacob were trying to wake me up.

_"...I guess we're like ghosts now."_

_"You mean, dead?"_

_"No, I think that's what's been happening." _

_"Okay... so... like, something's ripping the souls from our bodies and switching them?"_

_"I dunno. I guess." _

_"Why?"_

_"Oh, how should I know? I ain' the one doin' it. To honest with ya, I hate your life. It's so boring." _

_"Well, I'm not a fan of yours either." _

Angela sighed and tossed her hair over her shoulder. _"Well? Are you going back to your body or what?"_

_"What about you?"_

_"I'll will myself back, just like I did before." _

_"What if it doesn't work?"_

Angela shrugged, silent. I sighed and walked toward my body. I stared, for a moment anyway. It was kind of eerie, seeing myself like that and I could see why Jessica and Jacob were worried. My eyes were wide and unseeing and for an instant, I remembered the third Harry Potter movie, when Hermione was paralyzed. I kind of looked like her, but I wasn't in a weird position or anything. I reached forward, to touch my body, but my hand was stopped. I tried again.

_"I can't get back in!" _I said, my voice rising in panic. Angela rushed over, her eyes wide.

_"Try again!" _

_"I've tried three times already! It's not letting me in!" _

_"Well I don't-" _

xxxx

I felt very warm all of the sudden and moved a bit. I guessed I was in a bed and I felt sick, remembering that this was how I had woken up last time. I was probably back where I had started. Carefully, I opened my eyes, but I snapped them shut a second later. I was back in Soda's bedroom.

"Don't cry, don't cry," I whispered, grabbing a pillow. I dug my nails into the fabric. "I hate this... I just want it to stop... I was so close," I said, my voice cracking slightly. I wasn't sure who I was talking too, but I didn't really care. I held the pillow against my face and screamed.

* * *

_I get a kind of rushed feeling with this chapter. I dunno..._


	11. Chapter 10

_A short chapter. I couldn't bring myself to add anything else after the last line (Be funny if I told you the story was over. Hehee. But I still have to swoop in on Angela and give a reason for all of 'dis crazay stuff)._

* * *

**_Identity Crisis_**

_Ten_

"Angel, get up. I gotta take your ass home."

"Go away," I mumbled, pulling the sheets over my head. It was happening all over again... I was back in hiding... in some boy's bed. Yeah, it was still as strange as before. "I'll go back when I feel like it."

"...Yeah, right. C'mon."

"Go away!"

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Tim snapped, pulling the sheets roughly away from me.

"Just leave me alone... please?"

"...No fuckin' way," Tim muttered, grabbing my shoulder and rolling me over. "Again?"

"I'm as disappointed as you are," I said, shoving his rough hands away. What ever he was thinking, I couldn't tell. He was pretty impassive when he wasn't angry. And at the moment, he wasn't angry.

"What happened? They told me you were gone."

"I got thrown back. Kinda simple."

"Yeah, I can see how even a first grader could get what's goin' on. It ain't that simple an' you know it."

"Yeah, but I ain't gonna bother thinkin' about it anymore. I'm done. What ever. Take it as it comes and all that shit," I said, waving a hand and rolling back over.

"Sure, do what ya want, as long as it don't involve killin' anyone..." Tim said before he walked away. I felt kind of bad, listening to his footsteps disappear, but that passed in a few seconds.

xxxx

I watched impassively as June was ripped from the calender and July took it's place, but I still felt the excitement over the Fourth of July. I pushed any thoughts of the Fourth of July's that I spent with my friends and family and focused on my new friends and family. Well... mostly friends. The family didn't seem to be in much of a celebrating mood.

Soda was raving on about the fair and the fireworks. I always thought, _'I've probably seen better...' _and just shrugged and said I'd try to go. I was putting more effort into falling into Angela's life; snapping at her brothers and swearing more often. I was getting louder and more obnoxious when I was in a group of other girls like Angela and soon, I didn't even notice how short my clothes were or the weight of makeup on my face.

I was changing, but I didn't really care too much. If it made my time here easier, I wasn't going to complain. Sometimes though, I'd slip back into Lauren when I was around Ponyboy or Two-bit or Soda and even Johnny, because I didn't want to scare him away now that he actually said 'hi' when I saw him.

But swapping bodies? It didn't happen. I was beginning to think that, maybe, what ever was doing this had allowed me that one last swap to say goodbye or something. I suppose if I had known it at the time, I would have been saying goodbye and crying like crazy for the short hour that I was there. Hell, I'd have stood on a billboard with a megaphone and flashing lights just to get the message across... I probably would have eaten at all of the fast-food places too, since there weren't too many of the ones I was used to hanging around.

The television shows still bored me to tears and I was starting to miss all of those annoying "text 00whatever for sum luvin' now" commercials... I missed my cell phone too. A few times I had wanted to call someone, in fact, I think the most recent was Darry, so I could get a ride somewhere or something and I had dug through my purse looking for the damn thing until I remembered there wasn't going to be one in there. Pay phone was the way to go, apparently.

The heat was starting to become unbearable and a lot of times Pony and I would go to the movie house just because it was cooler in there than it was outside or at either of our houses. Johnny came once, probably because he knew I wouldn't be able to talk to him because we were in a theater. But, since I was used to whispering things to my friends about the movies he was sorely mistaken. But Pony always sat a few seats away from me and Johnny never said a word back. So I gave that up.

But, despite how social Angela was supposed to be, I went to the park around sunset, because it's cooler outside and the only ones around are little kids and parents... or a couple. But there, I was pretty much left to myself to look at the sky and sit on a swing. It was nice. It was the one time where I could just... detach completely. I wasn't Lauren, I wasn't Angela... I was just a girl, sitting on a swing.

I now wished I could be that all the time...

* * *

_Fwoop. I'm an evil person, yes, but I'm losing interest in this story and I don't want to drag it out just because of some rabid readers. It'll suck butt if I do. _


	12. Chapter 11

_Bum bum bum. It continues. I came up with a really lame theory. Don't laugh at my lame-ness, damn it! I know, I haven't been updating in awhile, but with school, I've been distracted. And lazy. I always get lazy when school rolls around. I'm just there for the social interaction (I'm such a greaser. xD). I don't think this chapter will be enough to make everyone happy again, but who knows?_

* * *

**_Identity Crisis_**

_Eleven_

"I don't see how this is going to help," Angela said, glaring at the screen of the computer.

"The internet knows everything. Especially Google... and Jeeves. That's the rule of the future," Jessica said, rolling her eyes. "We just have to find the right word for it to look for. So we're gonna make a list!"

"Uh... we don't even know what's been going on."

"...We'll look up... uh... oh crap," Jessica muttered, holding her head in her hands. "Damn!"

Angela sighed and leaned back in her chair, staring at the computer screen. "At least you tried," She said suddenly, putting a hand on Jessica's shoulder. "I mean, so the internet let us down. It's happened before. Remember when we tried to find Jacob's address when we were in sixth grade?"

Jessica looked up at her surprised. "... Lauren?"

Angela shook her head, blinking. "Huh?"

"How did you know that?"

"I... I dunno. I just started talking and it came out..." Angela said, rubbing her forehead.

"...You're really turning into her," Jessica breathed, her eyes wide. Angela frowned and looked down at her hands. They were more narrow and thin than her own had been. Lauren's mother had said that with hands like that, she'd be a good pianist. 'Lauren' had cringed and shook her head.

_"I'm a soccer player, not a musician."_

Anglea almost laughed. A soccer player. A musician. She was neither of those. She wasn't even the same age as Lauren and she got the feeling that Lauren was a lot smarter than she was too. It could be because Angela never paid attention in school. She paid attention to the _people_ in school. Sure, she hadn't been failing any classes by the time the end of the year rolled around. She was just coasting through.

_'Lauren doesn't coast...' _Angela mused, studying her hands. Jessica had turned her attention back to the computer as if any second the right word would put itself in. Anglea looked behind her, where Lauren's mirror hung. She was used to the blonde hair by now. At one point, she had wanted to be blonde. But not at the expense of her own identity.

_'Maybe I'll forget I was ever Angela... it'll be like Lauren never left. Maybe it happens all the time. Like, when people get older and they change... it just didn't work this time or something. It could be where the phrase, 'you're like a whole new person' came from. You really do become a new person.' _

xxxx

"Oh lookit th-" Jessica's face distorted in disgust. "Never mind," she muttered, quickly shoving the shirt back on the rack. Angela glanced over, but turned her attention back to the earrings she had been looking at. Neither of the girls actually had any money with them, they were just waiting for Jessica's older sister to finish her shopping.

They were ready to go to the Fourth of July carnival and see the fireworks and, hopefully, Jacob. Jessica started laughing.

"Look at this dress!"

"I dare you to try it on," Angela said with a smirk.

"Are you kidding?"

"Double dog dare ya."

"...Damn it," Jessica growled, taking the rather ugly dress and stomping off to the dressing room. Angela smirked, and picked up the earrings, raising her eyebrows and looking too the dressing rooms.

"Need help in there Jessica?" Angela asked, heading to the dressing room, and taking the earrings with her. She paused hearing Jessica's disgruntled "no", and looked through a rack of jeans. She picked a pair up, and hurried to the dressing room at the far end.

Angela did a careful scan of the dressing room, having seen the sign of 'shop lifting is a crime', as she took her time changing into the jeans. They fit, surprisingly. Normally, the would have been too big. She inspected herself in the mirror, still keeping an eye out for any cameras. She knew there was probably one outside the dressing room. Quickly, she took the earrings off of the fancy cardboard they had been on and slipped them into the pocket of her other pair of jeans.

She took off the ones she didn't own and stuck the cardboard into the left pocket, before she put them back on the hanger and pulled her own jeans on. She could feel the earrings pressing against her leg and looked into the mirror again.

Angela grinned, watching Lauren's face instantly light up. No one would ever notice. She grabbed the pair of jeans and put a disappointed look on her face as she opened the door. She hung them up on the rack waiting for all the reject clothes and waited for Jessica.

xxxx

Angela was standing around in the crowd, new earrings dangling and catching the sunset. Jessica hadn't told her she'd be performing under the huge white tent before the fireworks got started. But, after she had mentioned it, Lauren's memory kicked in. Jessica had been in dance for most of her life.

But she wasn't performing just yet. She was backstage with the other girls. Right now was some other girl's turn. She was signing a mish mash of songs, according to her. The one she was singing right now was pretty, but Angela couldn't make out everything she was singing. She had a pretty high voice most of the time, but even that sounded nice. Normally, pretty or no, Angela would have been cringing and leaving that tent without a second thought.

But Lauren liked this kind of thing.

She clapped politely when the girl finally put the microphone back on the stand and bowed, smiling, before walking off stage. Angela could Jessica and the other girls, in their dance costumes, crowded around the stairs, congradulating the other girl on a good performance.

An old man, probably nearing the end of his fifties, announced that the dance team, "Extreme" would be performing and the girls rushed onto the stage, their skirts fluttering. In honor of the holiday, their costumes consisted of only three colors, red, white and blue.

Angela watched with interest as these girls, smiles plastered on their faces, danced their little hearts out. She was pretty sure the cheerleaders she had seen at her school weren't able to do half the things that these girls could.

"Hey."

Angela jumped and turned to look at Jacob who had taken to standing next to her and watching the show.

"Oh, hey," Angela said casually.

"She's good, isn't she?"

"Huh?"

"Jessica."

"Oh. Yeah, she is."

Angela noticed Jacob shift a bit. Probably not a fan of the sudden laspe into silence.

"Does she ever talk about me?"

Angela wasn't sure why, but she felt her stomach drop. "Sometimes," she said with a shrug, fighting against the feelings that she shouldn't have been having.

"Yeah?"

The way his face lit up just about killed her.

"What she say?"

"That you're nice... attractive..." Angela said. Why was Lauren so damn honest? Why was she acting like her anyway? She would have lied and said 'No, she never really talks about you'. Lauren was pretty damn sensitive too; Angela had never felt so sick over a boy. And the happier he got, the worse she felt.

"You're being serious?'

"Yeah. Why would I lie about something like that?"

_Because you want him, damn it! That's why you lie! You lie and get what you want! _Angela screamed in her head. Vocally how ever she remained quiet.

"Hey... you think if I... ya know-"

Angela laughed and pushed Jacob toward the stage. "Stop asking me questions and go ask Jessica some, huh? I'm sure she'd love it."

Jacob grinned at her, looking over his shoulder, before slinking his way to the stage, being careful not to disturb the girls dancing or the audience that was watching them. They were mostly family of the girls and older couples. Angela sighed and glanced at the entrance of the tent. It was starting to get dark.

Slowly, Angela made her way out of the tent, the warm air and smells of food a definite improvement from the hot sweaty air in the tent. She had been getting used to a lot of things, especially with these summer months. Back in Tulsa it had been almost unbearable to be outside when the sun was out, or even in the house, since none of her friends had a very good air conditioner.

But now, the summer days weren't nearly as hot, though, a few days had been pretty insane when it came to heat. And every house she stepped into had the air conditioner on full blast. It was nice, really. She had hated being sweaty all the time. The only downside was soccer, which never seemed to end.

_Oh, and why is it that all of these boys keep ignoring me? _Angela thought bitterly. _Lauren's not that ugly, damn it! _

Angela headed to the carnival that was only a few feet away from the performance tent. She still had some tickets left over from earlier. She guessed she could keep herself entertained for awhile, until Jessica ran out of the tent, giggling and bouncing and going on and on about how "cute it was" when Jacob asked her out.

Looking up at the sky again, Angela stood in the middle of the crowd that was laughing and walking around her. Maybe she'd get lucky and get the top of the Ferris wheel when the fireworks started, which should be in a few minutes if she was right. At least she'd get something out of this day... besides a new pair of earrings anyway.

xxxx

Angela was all smiles, sitting in her seat on the Ferris wheel, her hands gripping the bar across her lap. The wink had been confirmation enough. She'd get the top of the Ferris wheel once the fire works started.

_Good, _she thought happily, settling in as the lights of the nearby football/baseball field turned off and the cheering started. The Ferris wheel came to a stop. _After all the shit I've gone through, this is the least they could do... _


	13. Chapter 12

_I know, I'm a nasty booger for taking so long with this one. But, keep in mind what I always say: this story was just to keep me writing. Nothing more. But, this story is liked enough by me that I'll continue it. Oh, wait, this is the end. Yeah, I didn't want to finish the story with Angela, so I finished it with Lauren. You can moan and groan all you like, but this particular story is over. **

* * *

** _

**Identity Crisis**

_Twelve_

I groaned, trying unsucsessfully to shoo Two-bit away. At Mrs. Curtis's insistance, I had stayed the night at the Curtis'. Everyone had. I think it was the parents' way of making sure everyone was going to make it and not get arrested or hung over.

I probably would have done the same thing, if I was ever put in that sort of situation... and happened to be like the Curtises. The only upside was the fact that I had finally actually met Mr. Curtis, who I liked as much as I did Soda. Everything else was making me wonder how Mrs. Curtis put up with every single one of those boys practically every day.

Sure, some of them are okay on their own (others like Dallas however...) but when you throw them all into a house together... it was like a really bad reality show. About natural disasters caused by people.

The boys were falling into the habit of calling me Angela, and I began noticing less and less. Soon the thought of, _'It's Lauren'_ completely disappeared. And it didn't surprise me that I wasn't bothered in the least. The sooner they forgot, the sooner I could, and I could just move on and live a normal life.

It didn't take long for me to realize that some of Tim's softer edges were disappearing, and he was just as snappy and forceful with me as he was with the rest of the family; I always returned the favor.

"Two-Bit, leave Angela alone, or I'll have to start all over again," Mrs. Curtis chastised gently, her fingers moving swiftly to try and tame Angela's hair into two french braids, a hairstyle I was actually familiar with. Two-Bit grinned and grabbed a chair, sliding it across the kitchen floor and letting it sit in front of mine. He dropped down, straddling the chair and resting his arms over the back of the chair.

"You look real nice, Ang."

"Shut up," I muttered, scowling. My scalp was throbbing and I had been woken up early by Dallas, who had accidently stepped on my hair on his way to the kitchen, so the french braiding wasn't helping.

"Well if it ain't the head Shepard himself," Dallas drawled from the living room. Mrs. Curtis smiled as Tim walked in.

"Almost done Tim."

"Don' worry, I ain't in a hurry," Tim said, leaning against the kitchen doorway and crossing his arms. I found myself praying that a piece of hair would wiggle its self away from the others, anything to keep me here with Mrs. Curtis and Two-Bit.

"All done. And your hair looks lovely, if I do say so myself," Mrs. Curtis said proudly as I slowly stood up, a forlorn look on my face. Two-Bit raised an eyebrow, and I rolled my eyes, before looking at Tim. He glared at me and walked away, and I trudged after him, nearly getting hit with the screen door.

We stood on the porch for what seemed like forever before Tim finally spoke. "Ya know, if I remember right, you didn't want to be like Angela."

I didn't answer. I felt dizzy. _'Please don't bring that up... please, please, please.'_

"Why the sudden change of heart?"

I stared at him, silent as a mute.

"You don't have to be my sister-"

"Just stop," I said finally, rubbing my forehead and leaning against a support beam. "You switch personalities more often than I do Tim, so don't lecture me on this. This is my choice. If it makes everything easier, it's what I'm going to do."

Tim gazed at me for awhile and I sighed and looked out at the street. "Do you remember anything? Your mother's name, your school?" Tim asked easily. I tensed, my fists clenching.

"Please stop..." I muttered.

"It's a yes or no question. Ang would have answered a bit snappier than that."

I realized what Tim was doing. He was pushing me.

"Well? Do you or don't you? C'mon it ain't too hard for you, is it? I don't know how much easier I can make it."

"No, okay! I don't remember anything!"

Tim smiled a bit, looking at me calmly. I stared at him, my hands shaking slightly and my face flushed. "You happy, you bastard?" I asked, glaring at him.

"No. I still got one more question. How hard is it for you, to know you're Lauren but not remember anything else?"

I slowly slid down to the porch floor. I could feel scratches on my back from the wood as my shirt rode up a bit. I didn't bother pulling it down.

"Remind me again how any of that is good," Tim said, looking down at me. He had won, and he knew it.

xxxx

I saw a lot of people that Angela, and sometimes I, knew at the carnival they had set up for the Fourth of July. A lot of the rides, however, I didn't recognize and half the time. I didn't even know the names of them. Still, there were some I recognized with names I didn't, and thankfully they still had the familiar Ferris Wheel set up. The food wasn't any different, but we didn't get much of that. The tickets seemed to be enough money wasted.

Two-Bit led me around the carnival most of the time, followed by Ponyboy. Pony asked a lot of hushed questions about the rides. When Two-Bit abandoned us for a blonde girl named Kathy, Darry made an appearance.

"Why aren't you on any of the rides Dar?" I asked, picking of a fluffly piece of cotton candy Two-Bit had managed to talk out of the girl working the stand for it. Ponyboy picked off a piece too, looking up at Darry.

"Rides aren't something a twenty year old does, right Dar?"

"Oh c'mon," I said with a smile. "My cousin goes on rides all the time and he's twenty. No one cares."

"Yeah, well goin' on a ride with my little brother and Shepard's kid sister are gonna earn some stares," Darry said, looking at the people walking by.

"So? Find a girlfriend and go on a ride with her then," I said with shrug. "Two-Bit didn't have any trouble, and I'm sure Dallas didn't either."

"Soda and Steve are goin' on rides with their girlfriends," Ponyboy added.

"Yeah, well I ain't got a girlfriend to go on the rides with. I ain't lookin' to hook up with a girl like Kathy or Sylivia either," Darry said in a tone that clearly said 'drop it'.

"Alright, fine," I said, holding the cotton candy out to him. "Here, you take this and I'll go on rides with your little brother. We'll just keep all of the stares for ourselves. C'mon Pony," I said, holding my head high and linking my arm with Pony's before walking away.

"What ride do you like?" I asked, looking at the lines of people. There were none that looked as fun as the Pharaoh's Fury where we were standing. But something caught my eye. "Oh, that ride! That's the Himalaya, isn't it?"

"Yeah," Ponyboy said, following my pointing finger. "That ride's still around then?"

"Are you kidding? That's one of the best carnival rides in the world," I said, dragging Ponyboy along. "At home, it goes so fast that when it goes over that hill there, it jumps off the track a bit. They made it faster because they stopped having it go backwards.

"It's a new ride," Ponyboy said as they stopped at the gate that surrounded the ride. It was louder, because of the music and the screaming, so Ponyboy had to raise his voice. "It used be the Caterpillar."

"Pfft, I'd rather ride something called the Himalaya anyday."

We decided we would go on the ride, when Soda sauntered over with Sandy, his girlfriend under his arm.

"Where's Steve?" Ponyboy asked as I handed the man our tickets and stepped through the gate. Ponyboy followed and waited for Soda to hand over his tickets.

"He an' Evie wandered off," Soda said with a grin as we walked up to our cars. "So I told Sandy we could hang out with my kid brother and Shepard's kid sister until they got back. Good thing too, I was wanting to go on this ride."

The seats still had the warnings in the back, so Ponyboy had to sit on the outside.

"Have you ever been on this ride?" I asked Pony as the same man that had taken our tickets walked by to check that the lap bar was secure.

"No. It's new, only showed up last year here, and I was sick last year."

"It's a lot of fun," I reassured him.

"Yeah, if you're on the inside and have a light girlfriend," Soda said with a laugh. Ponyboy looked back at him, curious, but Soda was too busy reassuring Sandy that he was the light girlfriend he had been speaking of and by the time that cleared, the ride was already starting.

"What's he talking about?" Ponyboy asked as the ride picked up speed and I scooted closer. I had remembered, surprisingly, what had happened the last summer I had tried to defy the law of the gravitational pull, and remembered the bruise on my at the time boyfriend's side because of it.

"This ride can hurt," was all I said, because by that time, I realized I'd have to tell Ponyboy how to turn his body so it didn't hurt when he was smashed into the side of the car.

xxxx

I was waiting in line with Ponyboy for another ride I recognized, the Tilt-A-Whirl, when Tim, Dallas and Johnny sauntered over with one girl. She was pretty, but I could see her eyeing every other boy that walked by, despite the fact that she had attatched herself to Dallas's side.

"Didn't know you were any good with girls Pone," Dallas said, eyeing me for a moment. "How'd you manage to reel that one in?"

I had the feeling that either he, or the girl, would have said a lot more if Tim hadn't been standing there. Johnny kicked at the dirt.

"How'd you manage to get a whore for free?" I snapped. The girl seemed more upset about this than Dallas was.

"I'd watch your mouth if I were you, Angela," she warned. I ignored her as I trotted up the steps of the ride, Ponyboy following after a moment.

"It was nice talking with you Sylvia," I said with smile as I handed over my tickets once again and walked through the gate. I was dropped down into one of the cars, Ponyboy following and looking at the others still standing outside of the ride.

"You probably shouldn't have said that," Pony muttered.

"Oh well, too late now," I said with a shrug as I watched Tim say something to Dallas, that made Johnny grin a bit and look away, and made Sylvia slap Dallas and storm away. "You think it'll be dark, once we hit one more ride?"

"Maybe. I wonder what Darry's been up to..." Ponyboy said, looking thoughtful as the ride started. I sighed. He probably wouldn't be back on earth until this thing spun so fast his head snapped back.

xxxx

By the time we got off the last ride, the Octupus, which I was surprised was around, it was starting to get dark and Ponyboy said that his parents and possibly Darry were probably already waiting at one of the best places to see the fireworks. He wasn't sure if anyone other than Johnny, Soda and Sandy would show up, but he said that the others were probably still around somewhere to see the fireworks.

It turns out the best place was at the top of a sledding hill nearby the carnival, but far enough away from where the fireworks actually went off that there really weren't that many people around. Mrs. Curtis gave me a hug as I made it to the top of hill and stroked Pony's hair.

"It's good to see that both of your hair stayed in place," Mr. Curtis said, which earned a laugh from everyone, though Ponyboy wasn't laughing as much as I was.

"Yes well, that's my handy-work, that kept Angela's hair in place," Mrs. Curtis said. "It was quite a big job, getting it all into those braids."

"Too bad I missed it," Mr. Curtis said with a grin as Soda walked up the hill, laughing with Sandy. "There's the two love birds."

"Hey Dad."

"Hi Mr. Curtis," Sandy said with a smile. "How's work going?"

"The same as it always is. But I'm earning money, so I can't complain."

"How have you been Sandy? Is your mother doing well?"

I tuned out the rest of the conversation and made a face that Ponyboy laughed at. As Johnny came jogging up the hill, the same process was pretty much repeated. I spotted Two-Bit with what looked like his mother and his younger sister. Kathy was no where to be seen. They didn't come up the hill, and Tim, Dallas and Steve never showed by the time the carnival lights were turned off and a swarm of people streamed away from the rides.

I squinted at the Ferris Wheel and realized that there were some people near the top of it. It had startled me, for a second, because I thought I was seeing things. From here, they looked like black splotches. The bottom half was empty. I jumped as the first firework exploded in the air and looked up as Soda whistled. It was a white one and the little sparks rained down like a waterfall before another one overtook it. I glanced at Ponyboy, who watched them in open fascination. I had done that too, before I watched the Discovery Channel and they did a short five minute thing on how fireworks were made. I also knew that, somewhere down there, people were running around with lighters or pugs, setting all of those things off.

I kind of wished I was as fascinated with the fireworks as Ponyboy was. I really wished that I was still the naive, unnoticed, soccer junkie Lauren.

I remembered what Tim had done earlier that day... I could still be Lauren, if I wanted to. I could find a nice, even middle between the two, couldn't I? I'm sure that what Angela would have done... and if I want to be more like Angela, I'll have to be more like me first. I liked that idea more and more as each firework exploded and once it was done, I dashed off to Two-Bit to see if he knew where my brother was. I figured if I was going to tell anyone about this decision, I'd tell the person that had urged me toward it in the first place.

xxxx

School started on September 1st, and I was armed with three months practice on how I should act. Tim didn't go to school, and Curly was skipping out on the first day, so it was the lone Shepard sibling and some of the people associated with the Shepard gang. I abandoned them, however, when I saw the Curtis gang in the parking lot. None of them were surprised; word had gotten around that Angela had been spending time with the Curtises.

"Hey there, Miss Lauren," Two-Bit said with a grin as he threw an arm around my shoulders. "Love the outfit. I must say, clothes that actually fit you do look the best."

"Yeah, it's nice to know I'm not wearing someone else's clothes for once," I said with a grin as I tugged on the belt loop of my jeans. I knew for a fact that wearing a skirt on the first day of school was a big no.

"Hi Angela, you look nice today," Sandy said as she flounced up and Soda wrapped an arm around her waist.

"You do too Sandy. You always do."

"Yeah, she has too, or she's gonna be outdone by her own boyfriend," Two-Bit said as we walked into the school.

Soda laughed, but hit Two-Bit over the head either way. It was something I was used to, and Sandy was used to it too, but the other people in the halls watched with interest as Sandy and I slipped out of the way as the two boys began pushing each other and calling each other names... while laughing their heads off.

"Angela!"

A quick glance over my shoulder revealed someone from Tim's gang beckoning me over. I strolled over, wracking my mind for his name. It wasn't on the mental list.

"Your brother's out in the parkin' lot, wanted to talk to ya," he said nodding towards a set of doors that led outside. I studied him for a moment, realized I would probably _want _to know his name, and walked toward the doors as I tossed a thank you and a smile over my shoulder.

I was a bit worried, actually, as I stepped outside and looked for which ever brother he was had been talking about. I knew for a fact that they had no reason to be at the school.

"Hey!"

I spotted Tim leaning against his car in the parking lot of the school. I jogged over almost immediately.

"What's wrong?" I asked as I slowed down.

"Nothin'. Just wanted to know who you were today."

"What?"

He dug into his pocket and pulled out a piece of paper. He handed it to me, crumpled and torn slightly. I unfolded it but I had guessed what it was already. I hadn't been able to find Tim after the fireworks over the summer and I had, in a hurry, snatched a paper from a notebook I had dug up at home, and wrote a note for him: _'Thank you -Your sister, Angela (or Lauren)'_.

"It got lost with all the stuff in my room," He explained as I glanced up at him.

"It's from July."

"I know. Apparently, you have a habit of puttin' the date on things like that. So who are you today?"

"I'm right in the middle," I said with a grin as I handed the paper back to him.

"Good to hear. I remember thinkin' I'd rather have Lauren for a sister, but I can make do with the middle option," He said, looking off at the school. "Don't get in too much trouble today. I ain't gonna be around to save your ass."

"Don't worry, I got backup," I said with a smile as I headed back to school. I could definately live with this.

* * *

_Fin._


End file.
